A Cuban, a Japaneze guy, an American and a Mexican are in a boat.
The Cuban pulls out a box of cigars, takes one and throws the rest
in the water. He puffs twice and throws it in the water.
He says, "We have so many cigars in cuba, we can spare a
few."
The Japaneze guy pulls some computer chip out of his pocket and says,
"We produce so many of these, we can spare a few."
The American looks at the Mexican and the Mexican says "Don't even
think about it."
During sex last night, my partner whispered in my ear, "Pretend you're my dad."
I was furious.
"You are one sick-minded girl, what a disgusting thing to ask me."
I stormed out of the bedroom and slammed the door.
I mean, you don't expect shit like that from your sister, do you?
I've been fucking this really sexy bird who is a twin.
My mate asked me how I told her apart from the other twin?
I said it was easy. Her brother has a beard.
What do Taco Bell and your period have in common?
They are both great, even late!
How many Jews can you fit in a volkswagon bug? 1004, 2 in the back, 2 in the front, and 1000 in the ashtray (hope to squeeze in as many as possible in that ashtray)