"Twins" joke

I've been fucking this really sexy bird who is a twin.
My mate asked me how I told her apart from the other twin?
I said it was easy. Her brother has a beard.

Q: What is the similarity between a rubix cube and a dick?
A: The more you play with them, the harder they get!

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A dumb blonde was really tired of being made fun of, so she decided to have her hair she would look like a brunette. When she had brown hair, she decided to take a drive in the country.
After she had been driving for a while, she saw a farmer and a flock of sheep and more...

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Give a man a fish and he will eat for a day. Teach him how to fish, and he will sit in a boat and drink beer all day.

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A cop pulled a guy over for speeding at which time the following conversation was exchanged:
Cop: May I see your driver's license?

Driver: Sorry, I don't have one. It was suspended when I got my 5th DUI.

Cop: May I see the owner's card for the more...

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Procrastination is like masturbation...
Sure it feels good at first, but then you realize you're only screwing yourself.

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anonymo:boobs haha
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Gi_H0e:Boii u can tell yo hairline to stop hiding cuz I don't bite....but dem clippers do
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Lueroi:LOL but old :L
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Lueroi:lol but old
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Anon:Good one
Funny Joke? 104 vote(s). 67% are positive. 5 comment(s).