Mexican Jokes / Recent Jokes

The American investment banker was at the pier of a small coastal Mexican village when a small boat with just one fisherman docked. Inside the small boat were several large yellow fin tuna. The American complimented the Mexican on the quality of his fish and asked how long it took to catch them. The Mexican replied, "Only a little while." The American then asked, "Why didn't you stay out longer and catch more fish?" The Mexican said, "With this I have more than enough to support my family's needs." The American then asked, "But what do you do with the rest of your time?" The Mexican fisherman said, "I sleep late, fish a little, play with my children, take siesta with my wife, Maria, stroll into the village each evening where I sip wine and play guitar with my amigos, I have a full and busy life." The American scoffed, "I am a Harvard MBA and could help you. You should spend more time fishing; and with the proceeds, buy a bigger more...

Q: What do you get when you cross a Mexican and an Iranian? A: Oil of Ole.

Why can`t mexicans be firemen? They can`t tell the difference between jose and hose b

An Irishman, a Mexican and a redneck were doing construction work at the top of a high-rise building.
It was lunch time, and when the Irishman opened his lunch pail he groaned, "Corned beef and cabbage again! If I get corned beef and cabbage for lunch one more time, I'm going to jump off this building!"
The Mexican opened his lunch pail and exclaimed, "Tacos again! If I get tacos for lunch one more time, I'm going to jump off this building too!"
Then the redneck opened his lunch pail and grumbled, "Bologna again! If I get one more bologna sandwich for lunch I'm going to jump too!"
The next day, the Irishman opened his lunch pail, found he had corned beef and cabbage, and jumped to his death.
Next, the Mexican opened his lunch pail, saw he had tacos and jumped to his death too.
Finally, the redneck opened his lunch pail, found a bologna sandwich and jumped to his death as well.
At their funeral the following day, the Irishman's more...

If you can run and play any sport while wearing chanclas...
MEXICAN...
If your late Tio left you a van and you turned it into a taco vending business,
Yes, you're a Mexican.
If you pronounce words beginning with the letter "S" by putting an "E" in front of it,
(estop instead of stop),
big time Mexican.
If you call a chair, a sher, you got it...
Mexican.
If you have ever hurt yourself and your mamacita rubbed the area while chanting,
"Sana, Sana, Colita de rana... "
You're Mexican, big time!!!
If you have your last name in old English lettering anywhere on your
car, truck, or tattooed on your back,
Yes! you ARE a Mexican (proud one too!)
If you refer to your wife as your ruca, your hina, your wifa, your old lady,
or your vieja, guess what?
Not only are you a Mexican, you're a cholo...
If you throw a "Grito" everytime you hear Vicente Fernandez,
then not only are you a more...

Jose and Carlos are panhandling at the freeway off ramp.


Jose drives a Mercedes, lives in a mortgage free house and has a lot of money to spend.


Carlos only brings in 2 to 3 dollars a day.


Carlos asks Jose how he can bring home a suitcase full of $10 bills every day.


Jose says, "Look at your sign." It reads: "I have no work, a wife & 6 kids to support"


Carlos looks at Jose's sign.


It reads: "I only need another $10.00 to move back to Mexico"

What's the difference between a Mexican American Princess, and a Jewish
American Princess?
A Mexican American Princess has fake jewelry and real orgasms.