Dirty Mouth Jokes / Recent Jokes
An explosion ripped through Baghdad the other day, nothing new. In fact most people wouldn't even read a story about an Iraqi explosion unless Lindsey Lohan was involved. This explosion, that killed 47, was special. How special? I'm glad you asked. This explosion, one of many that day, wasn't caused by insurgents or improvised explosive devices, this was caused by a gas leak, a well timed and detonated gas leak. According to US Officials, an explosion that ripped through a mosque and a library was caused by a gas leak and not sectarian violence that has gripped the country. I, for one, would like to thank the Bush administration for fighting the gas leaks over there so we don't have to fight them over here.
One survivor, Abu Malik Ababas, said, "When I saw that rocket coming towards the minaret, my first thought was,'Did I turn off the stove?'."
A high school principal in Southern California canceled a school production of Rent to prevent portrayals of homosexual characters. Hopefully she'll accept my puppet show alternative, Avenue Q. Nothing says wholesome, non-gay fun more than an acting troupe singing with their hands shoved up the back of a same-sex muppet.
"We live in a country where an 18 year old girl can't have a sip of alcohol, yet she can star in a double penetration porno."
-AG
Talk is cheap. Unless it is with wet, horny co-eds. Then it is $3.99 per minute.
I'm so broke yesterday somebody broke into my used car and didn't steal shit, they just left a note on my steering wheel that said, "My Bad".
They were even nice enough to lock my car doors.
When I was a kid, my father asked me, "Son, what do you want to be when you grow up?"
I said, "I wanna be just like you dad."
Just then my mother bursts into the room and screams, "How long have you been hiding this from me! When were you going to tell me!"
She then tossed a couple of gay porno mags on the floor and stormed out crying.
My dad looked at me and said, "I'm sorry you had to see that son."
I told him, "I meant lawyer by the way."
My black friend said he could tell I was a soul brother. That tickled my white ass pink.