Blow Jokes / Recent Jokes

Make race car noises when anyone gets on or off.
Blow your nose and offer to show the contents of your kleenex to other passengers.
Grimace painfully while smacking your forehead and muttering: "Shut up, dammit, all of you just shut UP!"
Whistle the first seven notes of "It's a Small World" incessantly.
Sell Girl Scout cookies.
On a long ride, sway side to side at the natural frequency of the elevator.
Shave.
Crack open your briefcase or purse, and while peering inside ask: "Got enough air in there?"
Offer name tags to everyone getting on the elevator. Wear yours upside-down.
Stand silent and motionless in the corner, facing the wall, without getting off.
When arriving at your floor, grunt and strain to yank the doors open, then act embarrassed when they open by themselves.
Lean over to another passenger and whisper: "Noogie patrol coming!"
Greet everyone getting on the elevator with a warm more...

How do you give a blonde a brain transplant... blow in her ear. Why did the blonde cross the road... never mind that, what's she doing out of the bedroom? What does a blonde say when you blow in her ear... thanks for the refill. Why do blondes wash their hair in the kitchen sink... that's where you wash vegetables. How do you get a blonde's eyes to sparkle... shine a light in her ear. What's the advantage of being married to a blonde... you can park in handicapped zones. What do you do when a blonde throws a grenade at you... pull the pin and throw it back. Why does a blonde have fur on the hem of her dress... to keep her neck warm. Why did the blonde climb over the glass wall... to see what was on the other side. How many blondes does it take to change a light bulb... 6 - 2 to read the instructions, 1 to find the switch, 2 to stand on, 1 to screw the bulb. How many blondes does it take to change a lightbulb... two... one to hold the diet pepsi and one to call daaaady. The blonde more...

Make race car noises when anyone gets on or off.
Blow your nose and offer to show the contents of your kleenex to other passengers.
Grimace painfully while smacking your forehead and muttering: "Shut up, dammit, all of you just shut UP!"
Whistle the first seven notes of "It's a Small World" incessantly.
Sell Girl Scout cookies.
On a long ride, sway side to side at the natural frequency of the
elevator.
Shave.
Crack open your briefcase or purse, and while peering inside ask: "Got enough air in there?"
Offer name tags to everyone getting on the elevator. Wear yours upside-down.
Stand silent and motionless in the corner, facing the wall, without getting off.
When arriving at your floor, grunt and strain to yank the doors open, then act embarrassed when they open by themselves.
Lean over to another passenger and whisper: "Noogie patrol coming!"
Greet everyone getting on the elevator with a warm more...

Sexual Tension Quiz
Instructions: For each answer, you will have three clues. Try to determine what the object or thing is that is being described. For every correct answer you give, give yourself 2 points, for every incorrect answer deduct 2 points.
If you score less than 14 points, you are in need of more sex. If you score between 14 points and 21 points, you are in need of more love. If you score over 21 points, you are classed as having a great sex experience. Now please begin.
"CLUES"
1. I am a protrusion that comes in many sizes. When I'm not well, I drip. When you blow me, I feel good.
2. I'm spread before I'm eaten. Your tongue gets me off. People sometimes lick my nuts.
3. I assist an erection. Sometimes big balls hang from me. I'm called a big swinger.
4. Over 1,000 people went down on me. I wasn't maiden for long. A big hard thing ripped me open.
5. You stick your poles inside me. You tie me down to get me up. I get wet before you more...

SEXUAL TENSION QUIZ
(Tip: Think dirty)
(Answers Below)
A. I am a protrusion that comes in many sizes.
When I'm not well, I drip.
When you blow me, you feel good.
(What Am I?)
B. I'm spread before I'm eaten.
Your tongue gets me off.
People sometimes lick my nuts.
(What Am I?)
C. I assist an erection.
Sometimes big balls hang from me.
I'm called a big swinger.
(What Am I?)
D. Over 1,000 people went down on me.
I wasn't maiden for long.
A big hard thing ripped me open.
(What Am I?)
E. You stick your poles inside me.
You tie me down to get me up.
I get wet before you do.
(What Am I?)
F. When I go in I cause pain.
I cause you to spit and ask you not to swallow.
I can fill your hole.
(What Am I?)
G. A finger goes in me.
You fiddle with me when you're bored.
The best man always has me first.
(What Am I?)
H. All day long, it's in and out.
I more...

Three generations of hookers were sitting around the brothel one dayjust talking about the business. The youngest one complained, "Youknow Mom and Grandma, now guys want a blow job and a fuck for $100! Idon't think I can stay in business at those prices." Her Mom thinks for a while and says, "Well dear, in my day we wouldgive a blow job and for only $25 and we considered ourselves lucky toget that!"Grandma looks at her daughter and her grandaughter and says, "Theboth of you don't know what tough times really are. Back during thedepression we used to give blow jobs for free because we were justglad to get something warm in our stomachs!"

Three little boys were sitting around talking about their fathers. The first boy said, "My dad can blow smoke rings."
The second boy said, "My dad can blow smoke rings out of his nose."
The third boy said, "Well, my dad can blow smoke rings out of his butt."
The first and second boys where amazed. The second boy said, "Have you seen him do it?"
"No," said the third boy, "but I've seen the tobacco stains on his underwear."