"The Religious Man and the Atheist" joke

A very religious man lived right next door to an atheist. While the
religious one prayed day in, day out, and was constantly on his knees
in communion with his Lord, the atheist never even looked twice at a
church.
However, the atheist's life was good, he had a well-paying job and a
beautiful wife, and his children were healthy and good-natured,
whereas the pious man's job was strenuous and his wages were low, his
wife was getting fatter every day and his kids wouldn't give him the
time of the day.
So one day, deep in prayer as usual, he raised his eyes towards heaven
and asked, "Oh God, I honour you every day, I ask your advice for
every problem and confess to you my every sin. Yet my neighbour, who
doesn't even believe in you and certainly never prays, seems blessed
with every happiness, while I go poor and suffer many an indignity.
Why is this?"
And a great voice was heard from above, "Because he doesn't bother me
all the time!"

In a crowded city at a crowded bus stop, a beautiful blonde was waiting for the bus. She was decked out in a tight leather mini skirt with matching tight leather boots and jacket. As the bus rolled up and it became her turn to get on, she became aware that her skirt was too more...

80
30

A guy calls a company and orders their 5-day, 5kg weight loss program.

The next day, there's a knock on the door and there stands before him a voluptuous, athletic, 19 year old babe dressed in nothing but a pair of Nike running shoes and a sign around her more...

193
52

A guy says to his friend, "I can't remember if the doctor told me my wife has AIDS or Alzheimer's."
His friend says, "It's simple. Drive her to the other side of town. If she finds her way home, don't fuck her."

174
40

A married man was spending the afternoon with his girlfriend when she asked that he shave his beard.
"I do like your beard, John, but I would really love to see your handsome face," she said.
"My wife loves this beard, honey," he replied. "I more...

57
15

Eat Right, Exercise, Die Anyway.

30
5
Be first to comment!
remember me
follow replies
Funny Joke? 5 vote(s). 80% are positive. 0 comment(s).