"Nostalgic Scotsman" joke
Duncan, the Scottish shipping magnate had returned to his hometown of Glasgow with a client, and they were walking on the shore while the ship was being loaded. Duncan stopped on a hill in a field near the city, pointed to a tree at the base of the hill, said "It was under that tree that I lost my virginity to a wonderful girl."
The client was impressed, mentioned that it must have a very special place in his heart. Duncan nodded, then said, "It was right here on this hill that the girl's mother stood while I lost my virginity that night."
The client was unbelieving. He said, "You mean to tell me that this woman just stands here and watches you and her daughter going at it down there?"
Duncan nods. The client says, "Well, what'd she say?"
Duncan says, "Baaa."
A dumb blonde was really tired of being made fun of, so she decided to have her hair she would look like a brunette. When she had brown hair, she decided to take a drive in the country.
After she had been driving for a while, she saw a farmer and a flock of sheep and more...
Two cats: Felix & Un-deux-trois, decided to have a race to see who could swim across the river first.Guess who won? Felix! Because Un-deux-trois cat sank.
(Un deux trois quatre cinq)
A lawyer and a blonde are sitting next to each other on a long flight from LA to NY. The lawyer leans over to her and asks if she would like to play a fun game. The blonde just wants to take a nap, so she politely declines and rolls over to the window to catch a few more...
An American businessman was at the pier of a small coastal Mexican village when a small boat with just one fisherman docked. Inside the small boat were several large yellow fin tuna.
The American complimented the Mexican on the quality of his fish and asked how long it took more...
While walking down the street one day, a Republican head of state is tragically hit by a truck and dies. His soul arrives in heaven and is met by St. Peter at the entrance.
"Welcome to Heaven," says St. Peter. "Before you settle in, it seems there is a more...