"Golf For Sex" joke
A man out playing golf slices off into the woods. When he goes to
find the ball he discovers a witch (hat and all) stirring a
cauldron. So out of curiosity he asks her what she is brewing.
"A magic potion" she replies.
"Well what does it for" he asks. "This potion will make anyone an
excellent golfer."
At this he gets really excited and asks if he can have some. She is
agreeable but warns him that it will have dire consequences on his
sex life.
After a short period of soul searching he decides to try the potion.
He goes back to the golf course and completes an excellent game of
golf. Next he challenges the golf pro and beats him easily. He
spends every possible moment of the next year playing golf at every
course he manage to get to and having a wonderful time of it. After
a year he finds himself back at the same course where he found the
witch. Out of curiosity he slices one into the woods so he can talk
to her.
"Well", she asks, "How has your game been?" "Great! This has been
the best year of my life. I have played all over the country and
never lost a game."
"And how about your sex life?" "Oh, not bad."
"Really? This stuff can really ruin a guys sex life. Say, how many
times did you have sex last year?" "Hmmmm, it was three, no, four
times."
"And you call that not bad?" "Not for a priest with a small parish."
Once upon a time, there lived a man who had a terrible passion for baked beans.
He loved them, but they always had an embarrassing and somewhat lively reaction
on him. One day he met a girl and fell in love. When it was apparent that they
would marry, he thought to more...
If Ida Lupino married George Wendt, then divorced him to marry Ted Danson, divorced him to marry Alan Alda, then divorced him to marry Ted Knight, and divorced him to marry Shelly Long, she'd be Ida Wendt Danson Alda Knight Long.
If Whoopi Goldberg married Peter Cushing, more...
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A lawyer and a blonde are sitting next to each other on a long flight from LA to NY. The lawyer leans over to her and asks if she would like to play a fun game. The blonde just wants to take a nap, so she politely declines and rolls over to the window to catch a few more...
A blonde walks into a bank in New York City and asks for the loan officer. She says she's going to Europe on business for two weeks and needs to borrow $5, 000.00.
The bank officer says the bank will need some kind of security for the loan, so the blonde hands over the keys more...