"Anything But Cheerios" joke
A 7-year-old and his 4-year-old brother are upstairs in their bedroom. The 7-year-old is explaining that it is high time that the two of them begin swearing. When his little brother responds enthusiastically, the 7-year old says,' 'When we go downstairs for breakfast this morning, I'll say' hell' and you say' ass'.'' The 4-year-old happily agrees. As the two boys are seating themselves at the breakfast table, their mother walks in and asks her older son what he would like to eat for breakfast. The 7-year-old replies,' 'Aw hell, Mom, I'll just have some Cheerios." The surprised mother reacts quickly and whacks him one. The boy runs upstairs, bawling and rubbing his behind. With a sterner note in her voice, the mother then asks the younger son,' 'And what would YOU like for breakfast?''' 'I don't know,'' the 4-year-old blubbers,' 'but you can bet your ASS it's not gonna be Cheerios!''
Person 1: Knock, Knock
Person 2: Who's there?
Person 1: Cows go.
Person 2: Cows go who?
Person 1: No, silly! Cows go moo!
I farted in an elevator yesterday... it was wrong on so many levels.
A man staggers into an emergency room with two black eyes and a five iron wrapped tightly around his throat.
Naturally the doctor asks him what happened.
"Well, it was like this," said the man. "I was having a quiet round of golf with my wife when she more...
Q: What's the worst trick you can do to your blind brother?
A: Leave the plunger in the toilet