Viagra Jokes / Recent Jokes
His girlfriend however was hospitalized for 3rd degree friction burns to her vagina.
The advertisement grabbed my attention right away, Cialis...works for 36 hours and let's you choose the moment. Then I began to wonder...am I supposed to choose the moment first or choose my date first? Is it multiple choice? Will it be an extremely hard choice? How will my crotch feel knowing that the decision making has been taken away from him and is now in the hands of my Cialis influenced brain? If my date doesn't agree with my choice..am I allowed to phone a friend? I put these questions to the test last weekend. I walked up to a woman in the club....radiating my chemically enhanced confidence...and asked her straight up..." ever made it with a guy who can go for 36 hours?" I had her attention and we went back to my place.My Cialis coated brain and I decided on a 2 hour marathon of wild passionate sex....2 minutes into it my crotch lead the mutiny and decided it was close enough. Next time...I'm gonna read the fine print on the box.
Harry picks up his Viagra prescription at the pharmacy. Eager to try it out, he takes one as soon as he gets home and anxiously waits for his wife to get home from work. In his excitement, he leaves the open package on the table and his parrot gobbles down all of the pills. Seeing the results and panicking, Harry grabs the parrot and sticks him in the freezer to cool off.
Unfortunately, Harry's Viagra kicks in just as his wife walks through the door and hours pass before he remembers the parrot. He rushes to look in the freezer, fearing the worst, but finds the bird breathing heavily, dripping with sweat and totally exhausted.
"What happened?" exclaims Harry. "You've been in there for hours, yet you're not only alive, you're sweating like crazy."
Panting, the parrot says, "Listen, pal, have you ever tried to pry apart the legs of a frozen chicken?!?"
With Viagra being such a great medical success for increasing men's
sexual prowess, Pfizer is bringing forth a whole line of drugs
oriented towards improving the performance of men in today's society.
Here are a few of the new ones:
Directra: A dose of this drug given to men before leaving on car
trips caused 72 percent of them to stop and ask directions when they
got lost, compared to a control group of 0.2 percent.
Projectra: Men given this experimental new drug were far more likely
to actually finish a household repair project before starting a new
one.
Complimentra: In clinical trials, 82 percent of middle-aged men
administered this drug noticed that their wives had a new hairstyle.
Currently being tested to see if its effects extend to noticing new
clothing.
Buyagra: Married and otherwise attached men reported a sudden urge
to buy their sweeties expensive jewellery and gifts after taking this
drug for only two days. more...
These signs are not to be ignored.
Sign#1: You're married
Sign#2: You're masterbating and your hand falls asleep
Sign#3 You have have to knock the cobwebs off your dick
Sign#4 When you have an orgasm you can clean up with a Swiffer
Sign#5 You're always alone when you have sex
Sign#6 You have Cialis,Levitra, and Viaga hooked up to an IV drip
Sign#7 You develop carpel tunnel
Sign#8 You're wearing your wifes or girlfriend panties and you don't even have a wife or girlfriend
Sign#9 Your blow up doll pops a hole
And
Sign#10 You are in prison
If you have any of these signs your sex life is hopeless
With Viagra being such a great medical success for increasing men's sexual prowess, Pfizer is bringing forth a whole line of drugs oriented towards improving the performance of men in today's society.
Here are a few of the new ones:
DIRECTRA - a dose of this drug given to men before leaving on car trips caused 72 percent of them to stop and ask directions when they got lost, compared to a control group of 0.2 percent.
PROJECTRA - Men given this experimental new drug were far more likely to actually finish a household repair project before starting a new one.
COMPLIMENTRA - In clinical trials, 82 percent of middle-aged men administered this drug noticed that their wives had a new hairstyle. Currently being tested to see if its effects extend to noticing new clothing.
BUYAGRA - Married and otherwise attached men reported a sudden urge to buy their sweeties expensive jewellery and gifts after taking this drug for only two days. Still to be seen: whether the drug can more...