Sergeant Jokes

  • Funny Jokes

    Czech walks into police station in 1968 during the Fraternal
    Czech: Hey, out there in the street, a Swiss soldier knocked
    me down and took my Russian watch.
    Desk Sergeant: Come again?
    Czech: Are you deaf? Out there in the street, a Swiss soldier
    knocked me down and took my Russian watch.
    Desk Sergeant: You're confused. It was a Russian soldier who
    knocked you down and took your Swiss watch.
    Czech: Well, maybe, but you said it, not me.
    Henry Cate III

    A soldier was asked to report to the headquarters sergeant for an assignment.
    The sergeant said, “We have a critical shortage of typists. I'll give you a
    little test. Type this,” he ordered, giving him a pamphlet to copy and a sheet of paper, and pointing to a desk across the room that held a typewriter and an adding machine.The man, quite reluctant to become a clerk typist, made a point of typing very slowly, and saw to it that his work contained as many errors as possible.The sergeant gave the typed copy only a brief glance. “That's fine,”" he said. “Report for work at 8 tomorrow.”“But aren't you going to check the test?” the prospective clerk asked.The sergeant grinned. “You passed the test,” he replied, “when you sat down at the typewriter instead of at the adding machine.”

    A Captain in the foreign legion was transferred to a desert
    outpost. On
    his orientation tour he noticed a very old, seedy looking camel tied out
    of the enlisted men's barracks. He asked the Sergeant leading the tour,
    "What's the camel for?" The Sergeant replied, "Well sir, it's a long
    way from
    anywhere, and the men have natural sexual urges, so when they do, we
    have the
    camel." The Captain said "Well, if it's good for morale, then I guess
    all right with me." After he had been at the fort for about 6 months,
    Captain could not stand it anymore, so he told his Sergeant, "BRING IN
    CAMEL!!!" The Sarge shrugged his shoulders and led the camel into the
    Captain's quarters. The Captain got a foot stool and proceeded to have
    vigorous sex with the camel. As he stepped, satisfied, down from the
    and was buttoning his pants he asked the Sergeant, "Is that more...

    In the olden days of the Legion Etrangere (French Foreign Legion), Lieutenant Lefevre was extremely happy to be posted near Bir Ounane, right in the middle it seems, of the desert.
    Boy howdy, did he enjoy the challenge of the elements, the demands for personal survival skills, the camaraderie of the other officers, etc! In fact, for four months, he enjoyed EVERYTHING!
    Around the beginning of his fifth month there, a steady ache in his groin reminded him that the hadn't had any female companionship and that it was time to put his johnson back to work. He confided one day in Sergeant LeBrun: "Sergeant, I've got a personal problem. I need a woman. What do the men do when they have this urge?"
    "Sir," responded Sergeant LeBrun, "there's no problem. They usually take the camel..."
    "Non, non, non. Jamais! Never! Never!" screamed the lieutenant. "I will not descend to such low conduct."
    Well, about two months later, he more...

    During an army basic training, the lieutenant took the batch on a match and asked each of them where home was. After everyone had answered, he sneered and said "you are all wrong, the army is now your home". Back at the barracks, he read the evening duties, then asked the first sergeant if he had anything to say "you bet I do" the sergeant replied, "men, while you were gone today, I found beds improperly made, clothes not hanging correctly, shoes not shined and footlockers a mess. Where do you think you are? Home?

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