Melt Jokes / Recent Jokes

Aug. 12 Moved to Indiana. It is so beautiful here. The rolling green hills are so nice. Can hardly wait to see snow covering them.
Oct. 14 Indiana is the most beautiful place on earth. The leaves are turned all the colors and shades of red and orange. Went for a ride hrough the beautiful hills and saw some deer. They are so graceful. Certainly they are the most wonderful animal on earth. This must be paradise. I love it here.
Nov. 11 Deer season will start soon. I can't imagine anyone wanting to kill Such a gorgeous creature. Hope it will start to snow soon. I love it here.
Dec. 2 It snowed last night. Woke up to find everything blanketed in white. It looks like a postcard. We went outside and cleaned the snow off the steps and shoveled the driveway. We had a snowball fight (I won), and when the snowplow came by, we had to shovel the driveway again. What a beautiful place. I love Indiana.
Dec. 12 More snow last night. I love it. The snowplow did his trick again to more...

Diary EntriesAUG. 12 Moved to our new home in Ohio. It is so beautiful here. Thehills are so majestic. I can hardly wait to see them with snow coveringthem. I love it here. OCT. 14 Ohio is the most beautiful place on Earth. The leaves are turnedall the colors and shades of red and orange. Went for a ride through thebeautiful hills and saw some deer. They are so graceful, certainly theyare the most wonderful animal on Earth. This must be paradise. I love ithere. NOV. 11 Deer season will start soon. I can't imagine anyone wanting tokill such a gorgeous creature. Hope it will snow soon, I love it here. DEC. 2 It snowed last night. Woke up to find everything blanketed inwhite. It looks like a postcard. We went outside and cleaned the snow offthe steps and shoveled the driveway. We had a snowball fight (I won), andwhen the snowplow came by, we had to shovel the driveway again. What abeautiful place. I love Ohio. DEC. 12 More snow last night. I love it. The snowplow did his trickagain to more...

Once upon a time there lived a king. The king had a beautiful daughter, the princess. But there was a problem. Everything the princess touched would melt. No matter what, metal, wood, plastic-anything she touched would melt!

Because of this, men were afraid of her. Nobody would dare marry her. The king despaired. What could he do to help his daughter? He consulted his wizards and magicians.

One wizard told the king, "If your daughter touches one thing that does not melt in her hands, she will be cured,"

The king was overjoyed. The next day, he held a competition. Any man that could bring his daughter an object that would not melt would marry her and inherit the king's wealth.

Three young princes took up the challenge. The first prince brought a very hard alloy of titanium. But alas, once the princess touched it, it melted. The prince went away sadly.

The second prince brought a huge diamond, thinking that diamond is the more...

Once upon a time there lived a king. The king had a beautiful daughter. But there was a problem. Everything the princeess touched would melt. No matter what; metal, wood, plastic,. .. anything she touched would melt. Because of this, men were afraid of her. Nobody would dare marry her.
The King despaired. What could he do to help his daughter? . He consuletes his wizards and magicians. One wizards told the king, "If your daughter touches one thing that doesn't melt in her, she will be cured". The king was overjoyed. The next day, he held a competition. Any man that could bring his daughter an object that would not melt would marry her and inherit the king's wealth. Three young princes took up the challenge. The first prince brought a very hard alloy of titanium. But alas, once the princess touched it, it melted. The prince went away sadly. The second prince brought a huge diamond, thingking that diamond is the hardest substance in the world and would not melt. But alas, more...

I want to melt in your mouth, not in your hand.

It's a simple feat to format and reuse AOL disks... but with a little imagination, a truly useful purpose can be found for those pesky white platters invading our mailboxes and magazines.
Mini cutting board (great for the office or the car, use metal door for knife).
Attach it to a ruler and presto! - you've got a fly swatter.
Construct a life size replica of Stonehenge.
At a restaurant, shove one under a wobbling table leg.
Money clip (use the metal door and discard the plastic case... the "rich nerd" look is IN this year).
Eye patch (for one-eyed software pirates).
Christmas ornaments (the more the merrier).
Give them to young children to use as building blocks.
Glue them to the bottom of the space shuttle and use them as re-entry burn tiles.
Dentures (melt & form them into new teeth for grandma).
Room dividers for hamsters.
Drink coasters.
Use multiple disks to create an ideal door stopper.
Ice scraper.
Bathroom more...

Once upon a time...
There lived a king. The King had a
beautiful daughter, the Princess.
But the kingdom was a sad place.
There was no laughter, and no joy.
The problem was, that
everything the Princess touched would melt.
No matter what, metal, wood...
anthing she touched would melt!!
Because of this, men were afraid of her.
Nobody would dare marry her.
The king despaired.
What could he do to help his
beautiful daughter?
He consulted his wizards and magicians.
One wizard told the king, "If your
daughter touches one thing that
does not melt in her hands, she
will be cured."
The King was overjoyed. The next
day, he held a competition. Any man
who could bring his daughter an
object that would not melt at her
touch, would marry her and inherit
the King's wealth.
Three young princes took up the challenge.
The first Prince brought a very hard
alloy of titanium.
When the more...