Mathematics Jokes / Recent Jokes

The math teacher asks his students: "What is 9 times 7?"
He gets several answers - all are either 62 or 65.
"Come on - the correct answer can either be 62 or 65!"

Q: How does one insult a mathematician?
A: You say: "Your brain is smaller than any >0!"

An economist is someone who gets rich explaining others why they are poor.

The last severe depression and banking crisis could not have been achieved by normal civil servants and politicians, it required economists involvement.

Contagion: A strory demostrating the possible outcomes from interlinkages in the financial markets.

Two economists sit down to play chess. They study the board for 24 hours and declare a stale-mate.

Q: What does it take to be a good economist?

A: An unshakeable grasp of the obvious!

Q: What`s the difference between mathematics and economics?

A: Mathematics is incomprehensible; economics just doesn`t make any sense.

An economist is someone who didn`t have enough personality to become an accountant.

Economics is extremely useful as a form of employment for economists.

Q: What`s the difference between a finance major and an economics major?

A: more...

Q: What does a mathematician present to his fiancée when he wants to propose?
A: A polynomial ring!

The cheif instructs his apprentice: "You take two thirds of water, one third of cream, one third of broth..."
The apprentice: "But that makes four thirds already!"
"Well - just take a larger pot!"

A woman in a bar tries to pick up a mathematician.
"How old, do you think, am I?" she asks coyly.
"Well - 18 by that fire in your eyes, 19 by that glow on your cheeks, 20 by that radiance of your face, and adding that up is something you can probably do for yourself..."

Q: What is the most erotic number?
A: 2110593!
Q: Why?
A: When 2 are 1 and don't pay at10tion, they'll know within 5 weeks whether or not, after 9 months, they'll be 3...