Jeans Jokes / Recent Jokes

Sitting at the bar and admiring the young girl tucked into her skin-tight jeans, the single gentleman asked, "You've got to tell me, miss, how anyone gets into those pants."
"Well," she smiled, "he starts by buying me a drink."

Dear Jokers who provide Yo mama jokes,
Please do not post yo mama jokes previously posted in this Joke Page.
It's a waste of your time, our time and bandwith.
Please read the following collection of YO MAMA SO FAT' jokes. Future
jokers, read this and if you can find something new about the fat mama
then submit your joke. (OLD MAMA, TALL MAMA, POOR MAMA etc.
will follow)
YO MAMA IS SO FAT
Yo mama so fat. . . she's fat!
Yo mama so fat God can't lift her spirits!
Yo mama so fat God couldn't light Earth till she moved!
Yo mama so fat God said "Let there be Light", and moved her fat ass.
Yo mama so fat I got rich by making her sit on coal.
Yo mama so fat I had to take a train and two buses just to get on the bitch's good side!
Yo mama so fat I have to roll her over twice to get her on her back.
Yo mama so fat I saw her on top of the Empire State building snatching at airplanes.
Yo mama so fat I'm more...

Observing his female coworker's tight jeans fit, a man asked in wonderment and admiration, "How DO you get into those pants?"

"Oh, some nice flowers, a little wine, and dinner at a chic restaurant is usually a goodstart," she replied.

A girl named Nila, went to shop to buy a jeans. She was
new to Canada and She doesn't speak English at all.
When she entered to the shop, the a man who work at the shop
asked her something... defnettly she didn't understand, but
she sail yes by moving her head. When she found the jeans
and went to fitroom, the mad also follwed her. When She
was in the fitroom, the man knocked the door twice. The girl
was so scared... she cried and run to her house. When her
husband came, she told him that the man in the shop tried
to come to the fitroom when she was alone.... Her husband
went to that shop and asked the man why did you do like this
stupid things. The man's didn't understand what they were
saying.. he told Nila's husband that he asked her that she
need help finding jeans and she said yes... so the man
said, he was just tried to help her.

What type of Asian are you?
Girls, take this test to find out
Guys, or scroll down. GIRLS 1. On a typical Friday night, you're most likely to be seen at: A) pool hall
B) the mall
C) at home, getting an early start on homework
D) cafe shop
E) your friend's house, having a sleepover 2. Your normal everyday wear is: A) tight shirts, spaghetti straps, baggy jeans, and extra dark lipstick
B) lots and lots of makeup - to impress the guys of course
C) thick glasses, long sun dresses, penny loafers, or sandals
D) high pumps, expensive designer clothes and tons of jewelry
E) college or Mickey Mouse sweatshirts with blue jeans 3. You usually give out your number when: A) almost never, guys get scared off by your mean looks
B) any foine guy happens to ask for it
C) never - you're not supposed to talk to guys
D) there's money floating around him
E) any white guy asks for it 4. When you go to the mall, you: A) give menacing more...

IF YOU'RE A GUY: You arrive to the party with a group of 10 or more other guys (in Honda's of course!). You are wearing a plaid or flannel shirt w/ a pair of jeans, Doc Martin's, and a white shirt underneath. The line at the door is short with mostly guys (90% guys/10% girls). You don't mind if any girl cuts in front of you even they are ugly. If a guy cuts, you want to start a fight. You hair contains two bottles of mousse, one tube of gel, and one can of hair spray in case one strand gets out of place. You are either bald or you have a 2-hour old fade. Your pants are sagging, a pager is always in the right front pocket snapped on backwards, and your car alarm remote is hanging out in the left front pocket. You stare at every girl at the party, but never approach any of them. You hope the girl you've been looking at, knows one of your friends and then you will say "HOOK ME UP!" Gets a woody if a cute girl happens to look at you and smile. As you come into the party, you say more...

Are You A Steamer?
Steamer - A person, normally female and also normally of 45+ years, who refusing to accept her age makes desperate attempts to appear 20+ years younger.
Take this questionnaire to find out if you are a steamer:
Your wardrobe consists mainly of:
tailored suits and silk blouses - you spend most of your time at the office
sweats, jeans and t-shirts - designed for your active lifestyle
spandex pants in neon colors, halter tops and mini-skirts which you share with your 14 year-old daughter.
Your hair is:
exquisitely highlighted by one of the finer salons in your city
your natural color
the palest white blonde you can get from a bottle.
Your favourite place to buy clothing:
Saks, Holt-Renforth - only the finest quality will do
K-Mart, Walmart - you'd rather spend your hard-earned money on more important things
Contempo Casual, Suzies or wherever it is your teenaged daughter and her friends shop.
Your complexion more...