Brothel Jokes / Recent Jokes

Two Irishmen were digging a ditch directly across from a brothel. Suddenly, they saw a rabbi walk up to the front door, glance around and duck inside. "Ah, will you look at that?" One ditch digger said." What's our world comin' to when men of th' cloth are visitin' suchplaces?" A short time later, a Protestant minister walked up to the door andquietly slipped inside. "Do you believe that?" The workman exclaimed." Why,' tis no wonder th' young people today are so confused, what withthe example clergymen set for them." After an hour went by, the men watched as a Catholic priest quicklyentered the whore house. "Ah, what a pity," the digger said, leaningon his shovel. "One of th' poor lasses must be ill."

One day at school, the teacher was talking to the class about there parent's occupations.
Jane put up her hand and said, "My mother is a nurse".
The teacher said, "That's wonderful, she helps to cure sick people."
Andrew then out up his hand. "My father is a pilot," he said.
The teacher said, "Congratulations! Your father helps people get to where they are going."
Johnny then said, "Miss, my father plays the piano in a brothel."
The teacher quickly changed the topic, but kept it in her head for later reference.
At the parent/teacher night a month later Johnny's parents came to see the teacher and the teacher asked him if he really was a piano player in a brothel.
Johnny's father replied that he wasn't. But that is what he told Johnny because he didn't want to admit to being a lawyer.

CARSON CITY, Nev., Dec. 23 (UPI) - A legal brothel outside Carson City, Nev. is offering first-time elected officials a 99 percent discount to help them avoid the kind of scandal that could cost Bill Clinton the presidency.
Dennis Hof, owner of the Moonlite Bunnyranch, says his longtime clientele includes a number of prominent U.S. senators and congressmen "who don't want to risk their political careers by having extra-marital sex with women who blab." The brothel promises strict confidentiality.
Hof said today he persuaded his employees, who are independent contractors, to go along with the offer, which expires when Clinton's Senate impeachment trial ends.
He got the idea while attending a Christmas party thrown by publisher Larry Flynt.
The "Hustler" publisher announced last week that he had uncovered evidence of extramarital affairs by several GOP congressmen, and planned to publish it.
Hof said, "What's this world come to when Larry more...

One very loooooong summer day, not so long ago, a guy was driving down a long and never-ending road, when he noticed a sign that said
Ten miles ahead Sisters of Mercy brothel.
The guy really confused by somewhat intrigued decides that it is weird but if it were true he might check it out.
Later down the road he finds the same sign but it reads five miles ahead the Sisters of Mercy brothel.
So now the guys decides that he is definitely going to stop at the brothel five miles down the road.
FIVE MILES LATER...
He drives into a parking lot in front of a small windowless building with one door that says entrance to the Sisters of Mercy brothel.
He gets up to the door and on the doorknob "Knock three times" is inscribed on it.
So the guy filled with intrigue knocks three times, and immediately after the third knock an extremely old nun opens the door and says.
"Hello, are you looking for a few good nuns."
"Yes, yes I've been more...

Presidential Election'2000Dear Abby, I am a sailor in the US Coast Guard. My parents live in the suburb ofPhiladelphia and one of my sisters, who lives in Bensenville, is marriedto a transvestite. My father and mother have recently been arrested forgrowing and selling marijuana and are currently dependent on my othertwo sisters, who are prostitutes in Jersey City. I have two brothers, onewho is currently serving a non-parole life sentence in Attica for rape andmurder of a teenage boy in 1994. The other brother is currently beingheld in the Wellington Remand Center on charges of incest with his threechildren. I have recently become engaged to marry a former Thai prostitute who lives in the Bronx and indeed is still a part-time "working girl" in a brothel. However her time there is limited, as we hope to open our own brothel with her as the working manager. I am hoping my two sisters would be interested in joining our team. Although I would prefer them not to prostitute more...

One day there was a woman who lost her cat named "LOVE." It was pretty dark outside and she lived in New York. So, thinking that he might be down the street, she put on her house-coat and went looking for him.
When a police officer stopped to ask what she was doing, she said very honestly, "I'm looking for LOVE."
The policeman arrested her on the spot.
The cops raided the local brothel and had all the girls standing in line waiting to enter the paddy wagon.
A little old lady walked up and asked one of the girls what the line was for. She indicated they were giving out lollipops. The little old lady liked lollipops so she got in line too.
When she got up to the paddy wagon door, a cop said, "Hey grandma, aren't you a little old to be doing this?"
She replied, "As long as they keep making them, I'll keep sucking them."
The cop got out of his car and the kid, that was stopped for speeding, rolled down his window. more...

A dedicated shop steward was at a convention in
Las Vegas and decided to check out the local
brothels.
When he got to the first one, he asked the
madame, "Is this a union house?"
"No, I'm sorry, it isn't," said the madame.
"Well, if I pay you $100, what cut do the girls
get?" he asked.
"The house gets $80 and the girl gets $20."
Mightily offended at such unfair dealings, the
man stomped off down the street in search of a
more equitable shop.
At the second one, he asked the madame, "Is this
a union house?"
"No, I'm sorry, it isn't," said the madame.
"If I pay you $100, what cut do the girls get?"
he asked again.
"The house gets $80 and the girl gets $20."
Again offended, the man stomped off down the
street in search of a more equitable shop.
His search continued until he finally reached a
brothel where more...