"Ugliest in all the land..." joke
Snow White, Tom Thumb and Quasimodo were walking down the street one day."I wonder if I'm still the most beautiful woman in all the land" said Snow White.
"I wonder if I'm still the shortest man in all the land" said Tom Thumb.
"I wonder if I'm still the ugliest man in all the land" said Quasimodo.So the three decided to go and visit the magic mirror who would tell them if they still held their titles.Each went in alone to consult the mirror and came out to tell the others what they had found out."Yes, I'm still the most beautiful in all the land" said Snow White."Yes, I'm still the shortest in all the land" said Tom Thumb."Who the hell is Camilla Parker-Bowles?" said Quasimodo.
Two newfies walked into a pet store. The first says "I want four budgies." Salesman-certainly sir, would you like two male and two female or all male or all female? Newfie-I don't care. I just want 4 budgies! Salesman-certainly sir, what color would you like? We have more...
Person 1: Knock, Knock
Person 2: Who's there?
Person 1: Cows go.
Person 2: Cows go who?
Person 1: No, silly! Cows go moo!
Knock Knock.
Who's there?
Banana.
Banana who?
Knock Knock.
Who's there?
Banana.
Banana who?
Knock Knock.
Who's there?
Banana.
Banana who?
Knock Knock.
Who's there?
Banana.
Banana who?
Knock Knock.
Who's more...
Q: why did the Maori cross the road on a motorbike?
A: to get to the other side.
Q: why did the pakeha cross the road?
A: to get his motorbike back!
A guy calls a company and orders their 5-day, 5kg weight loss program.
The next day, there's a knock on the door and there stands before him a voluptuous, athletic, 19 year old babe dressed in nothing but a pair of Nike running shoes and a sign around her more...