"Two guys in an elevator" joke
A small white guy went into an elevator, when he got in he noticed a huge black dude standing next to him. The big black guy looked down upon the small white guy and said, "7 foot tall, 350 pounds, 20inch dick, 3 pound left ball, 3 pound right ball, Turner Brown."
The small guy fainted!!
The huge black dude picked up the little white guy and brought him to, by slapping his face and shaking him. He asked the small white guy,
"What's wrong?" Our petite friend said, "Excuse me, but what did you say?"
The black giant looked down and repeated, "7 foot tall, 350pounds, 20 inch dick, 3 pound left ball, 3 pound right ball, my name is Turner Brown"
The white guy sighed, "Oh, thank God! I thought you said Turn around!!'"
A guy says to his friend, "I can't remember if the doctor told me my wife has AIDS or Alzheimer's."
His friend says, "It's simple. Drive her to the other side of town. If she finds her way home, don't fuck her."
Your momma is so fat when she fell in the grand canyon she got stuck half way down.
My wife has just found out I've been fucking a Hermaphrodite.
She screamed at me, "What's she got that I haven't got?"
"Well....."
Your Moma is so poor when I saw her wobbling down the strret with one shoe, I hollered-"lost a shoe", and she said-"Nope... just found one..."
Your Momma is so poor, she saw a burning cigerette and started singing, clap your hands, and stomp your feet, praise the lord we got heat!