"Standing Before St. Peter" joke

A Presbyterian, a Methodist, and a Baptist pastor, along with their wives, were on a cruise. Suddenly a tidal wave came out of nowhere, swamped the ship and they all drowned. The next thing they knew, they were standing before St. Peter.
Shaking his head, St. Peter first looked at the Presbyterian and his wife and said, "You cannot enter for you loved money too much. So much so, that you married a woman named Penny."
St. Peter then turned to the Methodist and said, "I'm sorry for you cannot enter either. You loved food far too much. So much so that you married a woman named Candy."
Hearing this, the Baptist nervously turned to his wife and whispered, "It doesn't look good, Fanny."

A dumb blonde was really tired of being made fun of, so she decided to have her hair she would look like a brunette. When she had brown hair, she decided to take a drive in the country.
After she had been driving for a while, she saw a farmer and a flock of sheep and more...

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A mild mannered man was tired of his wife always bossing him around, so he went to a psychiatrist. The doctor told him he had to develop self-esteem. The doctor gave him a booklet on assertiveness training, which he read on the way home.
When he walked through the door and more...

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A lawyer and a blonde are sitting next to each other on a long flight from LA to NY. The lawyer leans over to her and asks if she would like to play a fun game. The blonde just wants to take a nap, so she politely declines and rolls over to the window to catch a few more...

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A very attractive lady goes up to a bar in a quiet rural pub. She gestures alluringly to the bartender who comes over immediately. When he arrives, she seductively signals that he should bring his face closer to hers. When he does, she begins to gently caress his full more...

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You mamma is soo fat she sat on a rainbow and skittles popped out!

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Louise:A man walked into the ladies clothing store and shyly walked up to the woman behind the counter and said, “I’d like to buy a bra for my wife.” “What type of bra?” asked the clerk. “Type?” inquires the man, “There’s more than one type?” “Look around” said the saleslady, as she showed a sea of bras in every shape, size, color, and material imaginable. Actually even with all this variety, there are really only four types of bras to choose from. Relieved, the man asked about the types. The saleslady replied, “There are the Catholic, the Salvation Army, the Presbyterian, and the Baptist types. Which one would you prefer?” Now totally befuddled, the man asked about the differences between them. The saleslady responded, “It is all really quite simple.” The Catholic type supports the masses, The Salvation Army type lifts the fallen, The Presbyterian type keeps them staunch and upright, and The Baptist makes mountains out of molehills. Now, have you ever wondered why A, B, C, D, DD, E, F, G, and H are the letters used to define bra sizes? If you have wondered why, but couldn’t figure out what the letters stood for, well it’s about time you became informed. A - - Almost boobs B - - Barely there C - - Can’t complain D - - Dang DD - Double Dang E - - Enormous F - - Fake G - - Get a reduction H - - Help me, I’ve fallen and I can’t get up! And don’t forget the German bra: Holtzemfromfloppen
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Louise:Don't forget the German bra: Holtzemfromfloppen
Funny Joke? 11 vote(s). 82% are positive. 2 comment(s).