"He's as sharp as a" joke

He's as sharp as a beach ball.

Q: What's the difference between a girlfriend and a wife?
A: 45 lbs.

Q: What's the difference between a boyfriend and a husband?
A: 45 minutes

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A Russian is strolling down the street in Moscow and kicks a
bottle laying in the street. Suddenly out of the bottle comes
a genie.
The Russian is stunned and the Genie says, "Hello Master, I
will grant you one wish, anything that you want."
The more...

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Your Mamma's so fat, when she went bungee jumping, she broke the bridge!

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98

Q: What is the similarity between a rubix cube and a dick?
A: The more you play with them, the harder they get!

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A guy walks into a pub and sees a sign hanging over the bar which reads:
Cheese Sandwich: $1.50
Chicken Sandwich: $2.50
Hand Job: $10.00
Checking his wallet for the necessary payment, he walks up to the bar and beckons to one of the three exceptionally attractive more...

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