"Government Bonds vs Men" joke

A guy says to his friend, "I can't remember if the doctor told me my wife has AIDS or Alzheimer's."
His friend says, "It's simple. Drive her to the other side of town. If she finds her way home, don't fuck her."

A Russian is strolling down the street in Moscow and kicks a
bottle laying in the street. Suddenly out of the bottle comes
a genie.
The Russian is stunned and the Genie says, "Hello Master, I
will grant you one wish, anything that you want."
The more...

Your Mamma's so fat, when she went bungee jumping, she broke the bridge!

One day a man from Alabama comes to Georgia to get an education. He goes to the first professor he sees and says, “What can you teach me?”

Shocked, the professor answers, “Well, I can teach you about the power of reasoning.”

With a questioned look on more...

A guy walks into a pub and sees a sign hanging over the bar which reads:
Cheese Sandwich: $1.50
Chicken Sandwich: $2.50
Hand Job: $10.00
Checking his wallet for the necessary payment, he walks up to the bar and beckons to one of the three exceptionally attractive more...