"Competing For The Smallest" joke

There were three midgets, and all three wanted to be in the Guiness Book of World Records for having the smallest of something... The first midget wanted to have the smallest hands, the second the smallest feet, and the third (you guessed it) wanted to have the smallest dick.
They went to get themselves measured, and the first little midget came out all happy because he had the smallest hands. The second midget came out all happy because he had the smallest feet... but the third little midget came out all pissed off and said, "Who the fuck is Osama bin Laden?"

A guy calls a company and orders their 5-day, 5kg weight loss program.

The next day, there's a knock on the door and there stands before him a voluptuous, athletic, 19 year old babe dressed in nothing but a pair of Nike running shoes and a sign around her more...

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Q:what did god say when the first black person came to heaven?
A:oops I must of burnt one!!

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Two Polish guys are sitting on a park bench, and a bum comes up to them.
"Hey!!" he bellows, in his hoarse voice. "I got a riddle for you two. What has 2 heads, 4 arms, 4 legs, and stinks like SHIT??"
The Polish guys look at each other, and one of more...

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Arnold Schwartzinagor has a long one

Michael J. Fox has a short one

Madonna doesn't have one and

Bill Clinton uses his a lot

What is "it"?



A last name!

Now what were you thinking?

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Eat Right, Exercise, Die Anyway.

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