"Chuck Norris" joke

If Chuck Norris is late, time better slow the f*ck down

A guy calls a company and orders their 5-day, 5kg weight loss program.

The next day, there's a knock on the door and there stands before him a voluptuous, athletic, 19 year old babe dressed in nothing but a pair of Nike running shoes and a sign around her more...

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Had to defrost the fridge last night before bed.

Or 'foreplay', as she calls it.

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A married man was spending the afternoon with his girlfriend when she asked that he shave his beard.
"I do like your beard, John, but I would really love to see your handsome face," she said.
"My wife loves this beard, honey," he replied. "I more...

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A guy walks into a pub and sees a sign hanging over the bar which reads:
Cheese Sandwich: $1.50
Chicken Sandwich: $2.50
Hand Job: $10.00
Checking his wallet for the necessary payment, he walks up to the bar and beckons to one of the three exceptionally attractive more...

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A Paki, Bangladeshi and a Sardar are in a bar one night having a beer.
The Paki drinks his beer and suddenly throws his glass in the air, pulls out a gun and shoots the glass to pieces. He says "In Islamabad our glasses are so cheap that we don't need to drink from the more...

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makiah:lame
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vfjyun:gfhftrju dti7ik
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crazy_driver_78:I saw this on a "Top ten reasons Chuck Norris is a bad ass" poster many years ago. Worst part about it is Chuck Norris sucks ass.
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Anonym:lol..........that funny
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Anonym:your jokes are allsome
Funny Joke? 43 vote(s). 20% are positive. 5 comment(s).