"Cattle Call" joke

When the cattle had been loaded into cars and shipped to Chicago for sale, each car was appointed an attendant to feed and water the cattle during the journey. This is the story of such a cowboy:
Following the unloading of the cattle in Chicago, the cowboy headed to a restaurant for dinner. The only seat was next to a lady who looked wealthy and educated. He couldn't help overhearing her order. "I'll have a breast of fowl, virgin fowl, make sure it's a virgin, catch it yourself, garnish my plate with onions, a cup of coffee, not too hot, not too cold, and open the window, I smell a cow, there must be a cowboy in here."
Thoroughly pissed off, the cowboy placed his order. "I'll have a duck, a fucked duck, make sure it's fucked, fuck it yourself, garnish my plate with horse shit, a cup of coffee, strong as Texas mule piss, blow the foam off with a fart, and knock out the wall, I smell a cunt, there must be a whore in the house."

Teacher: Why are you late to school?
Kevin: Because of the sign.
Teacher: What sign?
Kevin: The one that says, "School Ahead, Go Slow."

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A mother was preparing pancakes for her sons Kevin, 5, and Ryan, 3. The boys began to argue over who would get the first pancake. Their mother saw the opportunity for a moral lesson; "If Jesus were sitting here, He would say 'Let my brother have the first pancake, I can more...

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While I was watching a basketball game on TV last weekend, my wife and I got into a conversation about life and death and the need for living wills. During the course of the conversation, I told her that I never wanted to exist in a vegetative state, dependent on some machine more...

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Teacher to naughtiest boy in class: " Tell me; Ramu; why is the globe
flattened only at the Poles and not anywhere else? "

Ramu to the teacher: "I swear miss; I didn' t do anything. The globe was in the same Condition last year! "

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Two blondes walk into a bar. You'd think at least one of them would've seen it.

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Danny:No doubt she was a democrat LIBTARD!
Funny Joke? 4 vote(s). 100% are positive. 1 comment(s).