Vietnamese Jokes / Recent Jokes

10) Viet Nam was a jungle war; Desert Storm is a desert war. (as noted by V. P. Quayle)

9) The U. S. is not the world's most profligate waster of rice.

8) We are not killing Vietnamese women and children in Desert Storm.

7) The White House wasn't smart enough to come up with a catchy name for the Viet Nam war.

7') Viet Nam was a conflict--Desert Storm is an operation.

6) Some Americans actually believed that we were defending a democratic government in Viet Nam.

5) The time difference from the U. S. to the middle east is better suited to prime time live coverage of the festivities.

4) Nobody ever compared Ho Chi Minh to Adolf Hitler.

3) We hadn't been supplying weapons and intelligence to the North Vietnamese until weeks before the war began.

2) The networks didn't have slick computer graphics with dramatic theme music for the Viet Nam war. and the number one reason why Operation Desert more...

A Vietnamese couple who has been married for twenty years went to the wedding reception of a close comrade's daughter. During the ring exchange ceremony, the husband started to cry profusely.

The wife, surprised by her husband's emotional outburst, said, " I didn't realize that you have so much feeling to share with your comrade's happiness."

The husband replied, "No, you are wrong! That was not why I cried."

He continued, "Twenty years ago, your father caught us doing it, and threatened that if I don't marry you, your VC father will put me behind bars for twenty years. Weeping even louder, the husband said, "If I had just gone to jail, I would've been a free man by now. I made a big mistake. "

An American, a Frenchman, and a Vietnamese refugee had a discussion about the happiness of life. "To me, happiness is returning home on a Monday evening, having a wonderful dinner prepared by my wife, then slouching on the sofa watching Monday Night Football," the American said. "You Americans are not romantic at all", the French injected, "Spending a lovely evening with my lover, walking along the Seine river, and having a romantic dinner on top of the Eiffel tower. That is happiness of life." "You call those things happiness", the Vietnamese said, "then you two still don't understand life at all. Imagine this. You are sleeping soundly at night in Saigon. Then suddenly you hear loud knocks on your front door. You hear loud voices,' Mr. Nguyen Van Binh, open the door!'. Awaked with fear, you rush out and open the door. Right there, you see two secret policemen ready to handcuff you. One man say to you,' Mr. Nguyen Van Binh, you are under more...

One day at the end of class little Billy's teacher has the class go home and think of a story and then conclude the moral of that story....

The next day Billy tells his story.... "My dad fought in the Vietnam war, his plane was shot down over enemy territory. He jumped out before it crashed with only a case of beer, a machine gun and a machete. On the way down he drank the case of beer.

Unfortunately he landed right in the middle of 100 Vietnamese soldiers. He shot 70 with his machine gun, but ran out of bullets, so he pulled out his machete and killed 20 more, but the blade on his machete broke, so he killed the last ten with his bare hands".

Teacher looks in shock at Billy and asks if there is possibly any moral to his story....

Billy replies, "Yeah... don't mess with my dad when he's been drinking.

The Vietnamese soldier serving in Cambodia, far from home, was annoyed and upset when his girl wrote breaking off their engagement and asking for her photograph back.

He went out and collected from his friends all the unwanted photographs of women that he could find, bundled them all together and sent them back with a note saying: "Regret -- cannot remember which one is you. Please keep your photo and return the others."