Unhappy Jokes / Recent Jokes

Why was the glow worm unhappy? Because her children weren't that bright!

The revered Mr. Lu, bereft of his spouse in his declining years, took a young woman named Zhu as second wife. Unhappy about the union, Zhu was often seen knitting her brows. One day, Mr. Lu asked her: "Do you regret that you have married an old man?" "No," "You're unhappy because my official rank is too low?" "No, it's not that." "Then why are you so unhappy?" "Neither your old age nor your low rank is the cause of my regret. My only regret is that I was born too late to have met you when you were young."

Happy people reported watching an average of 19 hours of TV per week, unhappy people reported 25 hours a week, and manic depressants reported watching 42 hours per week of NBC programming.

... always fifteen years older than I am.
- Bernard Baruch
... a matter of feeling, not of years.
- George W. Curtis
Youth is a blunder; manhood is a struggle; old age a regret.
- Benjamin Disraeli
When a man is young he writes songs; grown up he speaks in poverbs; in old age he preaches pessimism.
- Hebrew proverb
Age is not all decay; it is the ripening, the swelling, of the fresh life within, that withers and bursts the husks.
- George Macdonald
A man is still young as long as women can make him happy or unhappy. He reaches middle age when they can no longer make him unhappy. He is old when they cease to make him either happy or unhappy.
- Anon.
... when one begins to exchange emotions for symptoms.
- Anon.

Why was the glow worm unhappy? Because her children werent that bright!

Why was the lightning bug unhappy? Because her children were not very bright.