Trombone Jokes / Recent Jokes
How can you make a french horn sound like a trombone? Take your hand out of the bell and lose all sense of taste. orTake your hand out of the bell and miss all of the notes!
Q: How do you make a french horn sound like a trombone?
A: Take your hand out of the bell and miss all of the notes.
What is a gentleman? Somebody who knows how to play the trombone, but doesn't.
(Please don't try this at home)
August, 1998, Montevideo, Uruguay
Paolo Esperanza, bass-trombonist with the Simphonica Mayor de Uruguay, in a misplaced moment of inspiration decided to make his own contribution to the cannon shots fired as part of the orchestra's performance of Tchaikovsky's 1812 Overture at an outdoor children's concert. In complete seriousness he placed a large, ignited firecracker, which was equivalent in strength to a quarter stick of dynamite, into his aluminum straight mute and then stuck the mute into the bell of his quite new Yamaha in-line double-valve bass trombone.
Later, from his hospital bed he explained to a reporter through bandages on his mouth,' 'I thought that the bell of my trombone would shield me from the explosion and instead, would focus the energy of the blast outward's and away from me, propelling the mute high above the orchestra, like a rocket.''
However, Paolo was not up on his propulsion physics more...
A guy playing trombone in the opera had a fantastic gig on the day he had to play in the opera. He tried to find a replacement but without success. Finally he went to his housekeeper and convinced him to do the replacement. "I give you my other trombone. You just look what is the guy next to you doing and it would be OK".
Next morning he asked the housekeeper how it was.
"Catastrophe. Your colleague sent also his housekeeper to replace him".
What do you call a trombonist with a beeper and a cellular telephone? A optimist.
Q: How do you make a trombone sound like a French horn?
A: Put your hand in the bell and miss notes.