Triple Jokes

  • Funny Jokes

    You insist that your boss call you "Rowan Starchild" because
    otherwise you'd sue for religious harrassment. (Score double for this
    if you don't let that patronizing bastard call you "Mr. or
    Ms. Starchild.")
    You've ever confused the Prime Directive with the Wiccan Rede.
    You've ever cast a spell with twenty-sided dice.
    You said it was bigotry when they didn't let you do that
    ritual in front of city hall. It had nothing to do with the skyclad
    bit.
    You picketed The Craft and Hocus Pocus, but thought that the
    losers who picketed The Last Temptation of Christ needed to get lives.
    You've ever publicly claimed to be an elf, alien, vampire,
    faerie, or demigod, and been genuinely surprised when not everyone
    took you seriously.
    You've ever publically claimed to be the reincarnation of
    Gardner, Merlin, Aleister Crowley, King Arthur, Cleopatra, Morgana Le
    Fay, or Jim Henson, and been genuinely surprised when not more...

    A man walks into a bar, sits down and orders a triple martini.
    The bartender says "What a coincidence, The only other person at the bar is that beautiful woman at the other end. She is also drinking triple martinis".
    After a few sips of his drink, the man walks up to the woman and says, "Isn't it a coincidence that we are both having the same drink".
    She replies "Yes! I am here because I am celebrating. After 20 years of trying I am finally pregnant!"
    "What a coincidence" the man replied. "I am also celebrating. After years of experimenting, I have invented a multicolored chicken."
    At this, the woman asked "How did you ever accomplish that!?".
    "I had to try a lot of different cocks" he said.
    The woman replied "What a coincidence!!!"

    In ancient Greece, Socrates was reputed to hold knowledge in the highest esteem.

    One day an acquaintance met the great philosopher and said, "Socrates, do you know what I just heard about your friend?"


    "Hold on a minute," Socrates replied. "Before telling me anything I'd like you to pass a little test. It's called the Triple Filter Test."

    "Triple filter?"

    "That's right," Socrates continued. "Before you talk to me about my friend, it might be a good idea to take a moment and filter what you're going to say.

    The first filter is Truth. Have you made absolutely sure that what you are about to tell me is absolutely true?

    "N o," the man said, "I actually just heard about it and..."

    "All right," said Socrates. "So you don't really know if it's true or not. Now let's try the second filter, the filter of Goodness. Is what more...

    Keep this in mind the next time you either hear or are about to repeat a rumor!
    In ancient Greece (469 - 399 BC), Socrates was well known for his wisdom. One day the great philosopher came upon an acquaintance who said excitedly, "Socrates, do you know what I just heard about one of our students?"
    "Wait a moment," Socrates replied. "Before telling me anything I'd like you to pass a little test. It's called the Triple Filter Test."
    "Triple filter?"
    "That's right," Socrates continued. "Before you talk to me about my student, it might be a good idea to take a moment and filter what you're going to say.. The first filter is Truth. Have you made absolutely sure that what you are about to tell me is true?"
    "No," the man said, "actually I just heard about it and..."
    "All right," said Socrates. "So you don't really know if it's true or not. Now let's try the second filter, more...

    A guy walks into a bar and orders a triple scotch.

    The bartender pours him the drink and the guy downs it in one gulp. "Wow", says the bartender, "Something bad must have happened."

    "Yeah it did," he said. "I came home early today, went up to the bedroom, and found my wife having sex with my best friend."

    The bartender pours the guy another triple shot. "This one`s on the house". The dude gulps it down once again. The bartender asks "Did you say anything to your wife?

    The guy answers "Yea, I walked up to her, told her to pack her bags and get out!"

    "What about your friend?" asks the bartender.

    "I looked him straight in the eye and said BAD DOG."

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