Tend Jokes

  • Funny Jokes

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    During World War II, twice as many fighter pilots were killed during training than combat
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    In 1962 an outbreak of contagious laughter in Tanganyika lasted for six months and caused schools to be closed
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    A nautical mile measures 6,080 feet while a land or statute mile is 5,280 feet
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    No one can drown in the Dead Sea. It is 25 percent salt, which makes the water very heavy
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    Plants watered with warm water grow larger and more quickly than plants watered with cold water
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    Earth's oceans contain 7 1/2 million tons of gold, dissolved in the water
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    Children who are breastfed tend to have an I.Q. seven points higher than children who are not.
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    The bird flu virus could evolve into a form that is easily spread between people, resulting in a highly contagious and lethal disease.
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    The Chinese, in olden days, used marijuana only as a remedy for dysentery.
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    If you are right handed, you will tend more...

    Aries

    The Ram. Their farts are "Built Ram Tough". They may feel like Curly-Qs coming out of their asses because their farts mimic the curves of a ram's horns. They, the farts, sometimes like to butt heads with other farts. Since people born under the sign of Aries show strong leadership and like to get things started, they are always the first ones to fart while around other people. Their farts tend to be loud since they are energetic. Do you like to hear robust farts? Too shy to be the first one to fart? Get with an Aries.

    Taurus

    The Bull. Their farts can be very stubborn, and once released, they can stink up a space with power for very long periods of time-longer than average. Their farts just don't want to go away. Their farts can even be kinda sharp and hurt their *******s when they come out, because they are big and mimic the sharp horns of the bull. Since Taurus people love sensual pleasures, they must take care not to over-indulge and more...

    Why did the chicken cross the Mobius strip? To get to the same side.
    Why did the chicken cross the road? Issac Newton: Chickens at rest tend to stay at rest, chickens in motion tend to cross roads.
    A neutron walks into a bar; he asks the bartender, "How much for a beer?" The bartender looks at him, and says "For you, no charge."
    Two fermions walk into a bar. One orders a drink. The other says "I'll have what he's having."
    Two atoms bump into each other. One says "I think I lost an electron!" The other asks, "Are you sure?", to which the first replies, "I'm positive."
    Renee Descartes walks into a bar, the bartender says "sir can I get you a martini "Descartes says "I don't think..." and he disappears
    Where does bad light end up? Answer: In a prism!
    Heisenberg is out for a drive when he's stopped by a traffic cop. The cop says "Do you know how fast you were going?" more...

    ASTROLOGY: tells us about you and your future simply by your birthday. The Chinese Zodiac uses the year of your birth. Demographics tell us what you like, dislike, whom you vote for, what you buy, and what you watch on TV. Well, the Corporate Zodiac goes a step further: simply by your job title, people will have you all figured out...MARKETING: You are ambitious yet stupid. You chose a marketing degree to avoid having to study in college, concentrating instead on drinking and socializing, which is pretty much what your job responsibilities are now. Least compatible with Sales.SALES: Laziest of all signs, often referred to as "marketing without a degree," you are also self-centered and paranoid. Unless someone calls you and begs you to take their money, you like to avoid contact with "customers" so you can "concentrate on the big picture." You seek admiration for your golf game throughout your life.TECHNOLOGY: Unable to control anything in your personal more...

    Astrology tells us about people and their future by their time, date and location of birth. The Chinese Zodiac uses the year of a person's birth. Demographics tell us what others like, dislike, whom they voted for, as well as what they buy and what they watch on television. The Corporate Zodiac goes a step further: simply by an individual's job title, people can pretty much learn about an employee's hidden personality traits.
    MARKETING:
    You are ambitious, yet stupid. You chose a marketing degree to avoid having to study in college, concentrating instead on drinking and socializing - which is pretty much what your job responsibilities are now. Least compatible with Sales.
    SALES:
    Laziest of all the Corporate Signs, often referred to as a "marketer without a degree". You are also self-centered and paranoid. Unless someone calls you and begs you to take their money, you like to avoid all contact with customers so you can "concentrate on the big more...

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