Superman Jokes

  • Funny Jokes

    Superman was feeling bored after a long break of crime fighting & wanted to go out & party so he called Batman to ask if he wanted to go to a club & pick up some girls. Batman said Robin was ill & he had to look after him.
    A little disappointed, Superman called Spiderman to see if he fancied a Few beers. Spiderman told him he had a date with Catwoman.
    As a last resort, Superman flew over to Wonderwoman's apartment to see If she was free.
    As he landed on her balcony, he saw Wonderwoman naked on the bed with her legs open. Superman thought to himself "I'm faster than a speeding bullet, I could be in there, have sex & out again before she knew what was happening." So Superman did his super thing in a split second & flies off happily.
    Meanwhile on the bed, Wonder woman said "Did you hear anything?"
    "NO"! said the Invisible Man, "But my ass hurts like hell!"

    If Superman and The Flash were to race to the edge of space you know who would win? Chuck Norris.

    Cinderella, Superman and Pinocchio die and go to heaven. On their way they talk:
    Cinderella: "I want to be remembered as the most beautiful girl in the world"
    Superman: "I want to be remembered as the strongest person in the world"
    Pinocchio: "I want to be remembered as the greatest liar in the world"
    It's Cinderella's turn. She goes into the room and comes out smiling, saying "It's done. I'm the most beautiful girl in the world!"
    Then goes Superman. He goes into the room and comes out happy, saying "It's done. I'm the strongest person in the world!"
    Last comes out Pinocchio, angrily he says: "Damn! who's this Clinton guy?!?!"

    Kids Wear Superman Pjamas, But Superman Wheres Chuck Norris Pjamas

    Superman and Spiderman
    Superman and Spiderman are standing at a bar, Superman is looking a
    bit down, - What's the matter? asks Spiderman. - Well to tell you the
    truth, I haven't had "IT" for months and it's really getting to me, comes
    the reply. - It's funny you should say that, on the way here I was
    swinging past Wonder Womans flat and she was lying on her bed in the
    altogether with her legs akimbo says Spiderman with a grin... - What do
    you mean? asks Superman - Well with your powers you could dive in, do
    the business and be out before she knows what hit her Spiderman
    replies. - OK I'll do it........ Off he goes to Wonder Womans flat and
    sure enough she's still lying on her bed as if waiting for something!! He
    shoots through the window, does the job and flys back to the bar. -
    Bloody hell says Wonder Woman, what was that? - I don't know - but
    my arse is in pieces replied the Invisible Man

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