Stan Jokes / Recent Jokes

Knock Knock
Who's there?
Stan!
Stan who?
Stan back or I'll shoot!

One night a gay couple (males) by the name of Bob and Stan* were having sex.
I have to go bathroom, so dont cum until I get back- Stan
Then Stan returned and there was cum everywere.
I told you not to cum until i got back!-Stan
I didnt! I farted!- Bob
*Bob and Stan are entirely fictional

Stan: I won 92 goldfish. Fred: Where are you going to keep them? Stan: In the bathroom Fred: But what will you do when you want to take a bath? Stan: Blindfold them!

Knock Knock.
Who’s there?
Stan
Stan who?
Stan back or I’ll be sick on your shoe!!!!

Stan was seconds away from receiving a vasectomy when his brother and sister-in-law barged in the room holding their newborn baby." Stop! You can't do this!" exclaimed the brother." And why not?" asked Stan. "Don't you want to have a beautiful baby someday like my wife and I have here?" Stan said nothing. The brother grew impatient, "C'mon Stan, I want a nephew. Stan, make me an uncle." Stan couldn't take it anymore. He gave his sister-in-law an apologetic look and asked his brother, "You're SURE you want a nephew?" "Yes," the brother replied. "It would be an honor!""Well congratulations, you're holding him!"

Stan was seconds away from receiving a vasectomy when his brother and sister-in-law barged in holding their newborn baby.

"Stop! You can't do this!" exclaimed the brother.

"And why not?" asked Stan.

"Don't you want to have a beautiful baby someday? Like my wife and I have here?"

Stan said nothing.

The brother grew impatient, "C'mon Stan, I want a nephew. Stan, make me an uncle."

Stan couldn't take it anymore. He gave his sister-in-law an apologetic look and asked his brother, "You're sure you want a nephew?"

"Yes," the brother replied. "It would be an honor."

"Well congratulations, you're holding him."

Stan and John are walking to school one day and Stan is describing his new Playstation 2 to John. "Where did you get that?" John asked "I got it last night for Hanukkah," said Stan. "What's Hanukkah?" John asked.

"It's the Jewish holiday where we get presents every night for eight nights to celebrate the festival of lights."

"Wow, I wish we got that!" John exclaimed. The next day on the way to school John runs up to Stan, curious to see what he got. He sees that Stan is upset, "What's wrong? Where's your present from last night?" asks John.

Stan holds up a ball of crumpled wrapping paper, "It was leftovers night."