Quarts Jokes / Recent Jokes

What is grey and comes in quarts? An Elephant.

On the first day of Christmas my mistress gave to me
a pheasant under glass beneath the tree.
On the second day of Christmas my mistress gave to me
two chicken breasts and
a pheasant under glass beneath the tree.
On the third day of Christmas my mistress gave to me
three quarts milk
two chicken breasts and
a pheasant under glass beneath the tree.
On the fourth day of Christmas my mistress gave to me
four strutting birds
three quarts milk
two chicken breasts and
a pheasant under glass beneath the tree.
On the fifth day of Christmas my mistress gave to me
five litter pans
four strutting birds
three quarts milk
two chicken breasts and
a pheasant under glass beneath the tree.
On the sixth day of Christmas my mistress gave to me
six cans of sardines
five litter pans
four strutting birds
three quarts milk
two chicken breasts and
a pheasant under glass beneath the more...

On the first day of Christmas my mistress gave to me,
a pheasant under glass' neath the tree.

On the second day of Christmas my mistress gave to me
2 chicken breasts and
a pheasant under glass' neath the tree.

On the third day of Christmas my mistress gave to me
3 quarts of milk
2 chicken breasts and
a pheasant under glass' neath the tree.

On the 4th day of Christmas my mistress gave to me
4 strutting birds
3 quarts of milk
2 chicken breasts and
a pheasant under glass' neath the tree.

On the fifth day of Christmas my mistress gave to me
5 litter pans
4 strutting birds
3 quarts of milk
2 chicken breasts and
a pheasant under glass' neath the tree.

On the 6th day of Christmas my mistress gave to me
6 cans of sardines
5 litter pans
4 strutting birds
3 quarts of milk
2 chicken breasts and
a pheasant under glass' neath the more...

Why do blondes always drink with straws?
Practice.
Why did the blonde keep a empty carton of milk in the fridge?
In case he wanted black coffee.
Why shouldn't blondes be given coffee breaks?
It takes too long to retrain them.
How did the blonde die drinking milk?
The cow fell on her.
Why did the blonde climb up to the roof of the bar?
He heard that the drinks were on the house.
This milkman sees a note on the door of one of his blonde customers. The note asks for 100 quarts of milk. Thinking this a mistake, the milkman rings her doorbell and asks about the 100 quarts. She says, "Yes, I need 100 quarts. On the talk show I saw last night they said milk baths are good for the skin." The milkman asks, "Do you want it PASTURIZED?". She answers, "No...up to my shoulders will be sufficient!"