Punch Jokes / Recent Jokes

body: A Chinese man went into a bar in Hawaii to have some drinks. At the counter, he was amazed to see that he was sitting next to the famous Hollywood director, Steven Spielberg.
After a round of beer the Chinese sensed that the famous producer was glaring at him.
Suddenly, in a flash the Chinese crashed down from his stool, felled by a vicious punch from the Director.
Picking himself up, he yelled, "What the hell was that for?"
The director ranted: "That's for the bombing of Pearl Harbour, you #@&%*~! My dad perished in that bombing!"
"I am not Japanese, you stupid **~#@#!?*! I am Chinese!"
"Yeah yeah yeah... Japanese, Burmese, Chinese, you are all the same", retorted Spielberg.
Regaining his composure, the Chinese took his seat and ordered a double from the bartender.
A few seconds later, the Chinese turned around and delivered a mighty punch to the director, sending him flat onto the more...

There was once a Scotsman and an Englishman who lived next door to each other. The Scotsman owned a hen and each morning would look in his garden and pick up one of his hens eggs for breakfast. One day he looked outside and saw that the hen had laid an egg in the Englishmans garden. He was about to go next door when he saw the Englishman pick up the egg. The Scotsman ran up to the Englishman and told him that the egg belonged to him because he owned the hen. The Englishman disagreed because the egg was laid on his property. They argued for a while until finally the Scotsman said, "In my family we normally solve disputes by the following actions: I punch you in the nose and note how long it takes you to recover, then you punch me in the nose and note how long it takes for me to recover, whomever recovers quicker wins the egg."The Englishman agreed to this and so the Scotsman held the heaviest object he could find, took a few steps back, then ran toward the Englishman and more...

Hi everyone.... If u have a cell phone, Recharge ur phone every month freely by following this process Please follow the instruction & you can recharge your SIM card absolutely free. Yes it is possible, see how technology can be used to make technicians fool. I just got a mail from a friend of mine, whose friend is B. Tech.(ETC) from IIT Powai, teaching me how to reload my hand set every month for free. Engineered by a group of rebel programmers. I am going to share this to all of you. Please follow the instructions as stated below before you start it: Applicable for ORANGE (HUTCH), AIRTEL, SPICE & BSNL users only, sorry for idea, BPL and Reliance users and it is done illegally of course. But there are many things that are illegal in this world. But then who cares. Don't worry nobody can trap you. No legal action can be taken on you for this. So go ahead without worrying. You can only do this every 24th & 25th of the month as the network system is under upgrade. 1.) ** Dial " more...

How do you break a Polak`s finger? Punch him in the nose.

There was once a Scotsman and an Englishman who lived next door to each other. The Scotsman owned a hen and each morning would look in his garden and pick up one of his hen's eggs for breakfast.
One day he looked outside and saw that the hen had laid an egg in the Englishman's garden. He was about to go next door when he saw the Englishman pick up the egg. The Scotsman ran up to the Englishman and told him that the egg belonged to him because he owned the hen. The Englishman disagreed because the egg was laid on his property.
They argued for a while until finally the Scotsman said, "In my family we normally solve disputes by the following actions: I punch you in the nose and note how long it takes you to recover, then you punch me in the nose and note how long it takes for me to recover, whomever recovers quicker wins the egg."
The Englishman agreed to this and so the Scotsman held the heaviest object he could find, took a few steps back, then ran toward the more...

There was once a Scotsman and an Englishman who lived next door to each other. The Scotsman owned a hen and each morning would look in his garden and pick up one of his hen's eggs for breakfast.One day he looked outside and saw that the hen had laid an egg in the Englishman's garden. He was about to go next door when he saw the Englishman pick up the egg. The Scotsman ran up to the Englishman and told him that the egg belonged to him because he owned the hen. The Englishman disagreed because the egg was laid on his property.They argued for a while until finally the Scotsman said, "In my family we normally solve disputes by the following actions: I punch you in the nose and note how long it takes you to recover, then you punch me in the nose and note how long it takes for me to recover, whomever recovers quicker wins the egg."The Englishman agreed to this and so the Scotsman held the heaviest object he could find, took a few steps back, then ran toward the Englishman and more...

There was once a Scotsman and an Englishman who lived next door to each other. The Scotsman owned a hen and each morning would look in his garden and pick up one of his hen’s eggs for breakfast.
One day he looked outside and saw that the hen had laid an egg in the Englishman’s garden. He was about to go next door when he saw the Englishman pick up the egg. The Scotsman ran up to the Englishman and told him that the egg belonged to him because he owned the hen. The Englishman disagreed because the egg was laid on his property.
They argued for a while until finally the Scotsman said, “In my family we normally solve disputes by the following actions: I punch you in the nose and note how long it takes you to recover, then you punch me in the nose and note how long it takes for me to recover, whomever recovers quicker wins the egg. ”
The Englishman agreed to this and so the Scotsman held the heaviest object he could find, took a few steps back, then ran toward the more...