Publicly Jokes

At a news conference, a journalist said to the politician running for mayor, "Your former secretary said publicly that you have a small penis... Would you please comment on this?"
"The truth really is," replied the politician, "That she has a big mouth."

Penalty for horse theft is death by hanging. It is considered an offense to shower naked. You are not allowed to break more than three dishes per day, or chip the edges of more than four cups and/or saucers. It is illegal to block any traveled wagon road. Women may be fined for falling asleep under a hair dryer, as can the salon owner. If an elephant is left tied to a parking meter, the parking fee has to be paid just as it would for a vehicle. It is illegal to sing in a public place while attired in a swimsuit. You may not fart in a public place after 6 P. M. on Thursdays. Men may not be seen publicly in any kind of strapless gown. It is illegal to skateboard without a license. A special law prohibits unmarried women from parachuting on Sunday or she shall risk arrest, fine, and/or jailing. Having sexual relations with a porcupine is illegal. It is illegal to molest a Key deer. If caught one will be fined or will have to go to jail. It is against the city ordinance to hang your more...

In Ottumwa, Iowa, "It is unlawful for any male person, within the corporate limits of the (city), to wink at any female person with whom he is unaquainted."

In Los Angeles, you cannot bathe two babies in the same tub at the same time.

In Zion, Ill., it is illegal for anyone to give lighted cigars to dogs, cats, and other domesticated animals kept as pets. Kibo.

In Carmel, N. Y., a man can`t go outside while wearing a jacket and pants that do not match. nj.

Attention Gooley: In Clawson, Mich., there is a law that makes it LEGAL for a farmer to sleep with his pigs, cows, horses, goats, and chickens.

In Gary, Ind., persons are prohibited from attending a movie house or other theater and from riding a public streetcar within four hours of eating garlic.

In Miami, it`s illegal for men to be seen publicly in any kind of strapless gown. Blair!

In St. Louis, it`s illegal to sit on the curb of any city more...

Please join us in supporting the Republican National Committee`s nomination of George W. Bush and Dick Chenney as candidates for President and Vice President of the United States. From this day forward, all our efforts will be focused on the "Bush and Dick" campaign. Joining our campaign as national spokespersons are Ellen Degeneris who said publicly, "I like Bush," and Elton John who said publicly, "I like Dick." Also supporting the cause is Angelina Jolie who said publicly, "I like both Bush and Dick." If you wish to see a lot of Bush and Dick, please sign up to work for their election. For those of you who prefer Gore, the following bumper stickers are available: "Lick Bush in 2000."

Penalty for horse theft is death by hanging. It is considered an offense to shower naked. You are not allowed to break more than three dishes per day, or chip the edges of more than four cups and/or saucers. It is illegal to block any traveled wagon road. Women may be fined for falling asleep under a hair dryer, as can the salon owner. If an elephant is left tied to a parking meter, the parking fee has to be paid just as it would for a vehicle. It is illegal to sing in a public place while attired in a swimsuit. You may not fart in a public place after 6 P.M. on Thursdays. Men may not be seen publicly in any kind of strapless gown. It is illegal to skateboard without a license. A special law prohibits unmarried women from parachuting on Sunday or she shall risk arrest, fine, and/or jailing. Having sexual relations with a porcupine is illegal. It is illegal to molest a Key deer. If caught one will be fined or will have to go to jail. It is against the city ordinance to hang your more...