Banned Jokes

  • Funny Jokes

    After stopping for drinks at an illegal bar, a Zimbabwean bus driver found that the 20 mental patients he was supposed to be transporting from Harare to Bulawayo had escaped. Not wanting to admit his incompetence, the driver went to a nearby bus-stop and offered everyone in the queue a free ride. He then delivered the passengers to the mental hospital, telling staff that the patients were very excitable and prone to bizarre fantasies. The deception wasn't discovered for 3 days.

    Texan prisons have banned convicts on death row from having last cigarette, on the grounds that it is bad for their health. However, to compensate for this, condemned men will instead be permitted to chew a stick of celery.

    An American teenager was in hospital yesterday recovering from serious head wounds received from an oncoming train. When asked about how he received the injuries, the lad told the police that he was simply trying to see how close he could get his head to a moving train more...

    Why was the hen banned from sending e-mails? She was always using fowl language.

    The already retired Martina Hingis has been inexplicably banned for two years for testing positive for cocaine. That'll show her. Officials learned of her cocaine problem after she snorted the service line.

    Top ten reasons why the movie "Bombay" should be banned in Bombay:
    10. The Hero and Heroine fall in love without first having a fight
    9. The Hero doesn`t sing "mere pyaari behana" to his sister, neither
    does she get raped nor does she get married off to some goon who ill
    treats her.
    8. The Hero actually asks the Heroine to elope with him instead of
    confronting her father and finally winning him over.
    7. The Hero`s bachelor friends at work do not get to come home and enjoy a
    meal cooked by the newly wed bride, with one of them ogling at her
    with evil intentions.
    6. Since the Hero and Heroine get married very early in the movie, they
    should have known that something was going to go wrong and should have
    taken due care.
    5. The movie is called "Bombay" but we don`t get to see even one overflowing
    electric train. (It is like Ice station Zebra with no Zebras around)
    4. Hero/Heroine do more...

    All Raju named chai-wallahs around BSE will be banned soon.

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