Protested Jokes / Recent Jokes

A Haryana Jat who had been irritated by his failure to answer any of the riddles put to him by a clever bania said angrily:' All right, now you answer this riddle: What is hung on a wall, is red, drips and speaks?'
After a while the bania admitted he did not know the answer.
'It is a picture!', said the Jat triumphantly.
'A picture? It can be hung on a wall but it is not always red,' protested the bania.
'Then paint it red.'
A picture doesn't drip; its dry,' protested the bania again.
'Put fresh paint on it and it will drip.'' But whoever heard of a picture talk!'
'That's right!', replied the Jat,' I added that to make sure a cunning bania like you would not get the answer.'

Once a doctor got a telephone call in the middle of night. The caller sounded very excited. "Doctor, please come at once. My wife is in great pain and I am sure it is appendicitis," he said. The doctor assured him that there was no need to panic. "I will come in the morning, lne man protested, "But doctor, my wife is really serious. The doctor replied, "I took out your wife's appendix two years ago. She can't have another." The caller protested, "That is alright doctor, but now I have got another wife!

A guy found himself in the mood around bedtime. He began cuddling up to his wife who was clearly not interested. He asked her what the problem was.
She complained that he was totally unresponsive to her needs. In typical male fashion, he protested, then asked what she meant.
She replied, "For example, I'm in the mood for snails right now."
"You've got to be kidding. It's 11 PM: where the hell am I going to get escargot at this hour?!" he protested.
"If you don't care enough to get me snails, you ain't getting any." We next find our disgruntled husband an the local 24 hour supermarket, buying a box of live snails. On the way home, as luck would have it, he stopped to help a lovely young thing with a flat tire; and that's about all that was flat.
After a few drinks at a local watering hole, he found himself in her bed, doing what he originally had proposed to his wife. Our wayward husband was shocked when he woke at 8 AM. He raced home, more...

"But this isn't an engagement ring." the young lady protested. "Why it's just a tiny unset diamond." "Yeah " I know." said the fellow, "And, it'll be mounted in a cluster around a big one, the very day after you a