Partners Jokes / Recent Jokes

Two law partners leave their office and go to lunch. In the middle of lunch the junior partner slaps his forehead.
"Damn," he says. "I forgot to lock the office safe before we left."
His partner replies " What are you worried about? We're both here."

The room was full of pregnant women and their partners. The Lamaze class was in full swing. The instructor was teaching the women how to breathe properly, and informing the men how to give the necessary assurances at this stage of the plan."Ladies, exercise is good for you," announced the teacher. "Walking is especially beneficial. And, gentlemen, it wouldn't hurt you to take the time to go walking with your partner!"The room was very quiet. Finally, a man in the middle of the group raised his hand."Yes?" asked the instructor."Is it all right if she carries a golf bag while we walk?"

Two law partners leave their office and go to lunch. In the middle of lunch the junior partner slaps his forehead."Damn," he says. "I forgot to lock the office safe before we left." His partner replies " What are you worried about? We're both here."

Four international executives are playing golf. On the third hole a ringing sound is heard. The British golfer fumbles in his bag, picks out his cellular phone, turns away from his partners and has a brief conversation.
“Terribly sorry chaps, but one has to keep one’s finger on the pulse and all that. ” His companions murmur acknowledgment.
On the fourth hole there is another ring. The American says “excuse me”, places his thumb to his ear and holds his pinkie near his mouth, and has an intense conversation. He turns back to the bewildered group.
“Oh, this is the latest thing on the Coast, ” he says “I’ve got a microphone grafted into my pinkie and a receiver in my thumb. It’s really convenient. ”
They play on for a few more holes, at which point there is a loud ring. The German, who had been leaning over his putt, snaps to attention. “Ja, verstehen, verstehen, ja, ja. Auf Wiedersehen. ” He snaps back to normal.
“This is really the more...

1. Ladies are prohibited from touching gentlemen's balls,
either with hands or clubs.
2. All holes must be kept clean.
3. Gentlemen making a hole-in-one, must change lady
partners in the second round.
4. Ladies are requested to remain quiet while gentlemen
are taking short strokes.
5. Partners are requested to off off together at each tee.
6. When the lady partner goes off first, the gentleman
must not delay the stroke but continue to play.
7. In cases where the lay is impossible, ladies have
the privilege of choosing a new position.
8. When the gentleman finds this impossible, he may
choose a new lay starting at least a ball's length
the hole.
9. Players are requested to refrain from playing any
holes under repair.
10. While the management strives to improve the course in every
way, they cannot be held responsible for the loss
or damage of balls in the brush or around the holes.