Favorite Jokes

  • Funny Jokes

    What is a dolphin's favorite TV show? Whale of fortune!

    Farmer Joe decided his injuries from his recent accident were serious enough to take the trucking company responsible for the accident to court. In court, the trucking company's fancy lawyer was questioning farmer Joe.
    "Didn't you say, at the scene of the accident, that you were fine?"
    ''Well, I'll tell you what happened. I had just loaded my favorite mule Bessie into the-"
    ''I didn't ask for any details,'' the lawyer interrupted. ''Just answer the question. Did you not say, at the scene of the accident, that you were fine?"
    ''Well I had just got Bessie into the trailer and was driving down the road-''
    ''Judge, I am trying to establish the fact that, at the scene of the accident, this man told the Highway Patrolman on the scene that he was just fine. Now several weeks after the accident he is trying to sue my client. I believe he is a fraud. Please tell him to simply answer the question.'' By this time the Judge was fairly interested in Farmer more...

    Bruce Lee is actually a Malayalee, but he left Kerala, the land of MaveLee, because he didn't have Jo lee or Koo Lee. He was not happy to be a ThozhilaLee or Vazhakkaa Lee and decided that he wants to become a MuthalaLee by being a Pora Lee. Actually, he invented his most popular film titles from the Malayalam word Vyaa Lee (Dragon). His favorite goddess was Ka Lee and he enjoyed Adipo Lee a lot. What is Bruce Lee's favorite weapon? - Kodaa Lee.. According to Bruce Lee, which is the Venomous snake? - Ana Lee. Place where Bruce Lee stays when he is in Kerala -Adima Lee. Bruce Lee's Favourite Malayalam Channel- Kaira Lee. Bruce Lee favorite vegetable? -Thakkaa Lee. What sound does Bruce Lee make when some one hits him? - Nilavi Lee. What is Bruce Lee's pet - Chunde Lee What kind of water does Bruce Lee prefer with his lunch?- Karingaa Lee. What is Bruce Lee's Girl Friend's name? - Anaarka Lee. What is Bruce Lee's nick name? - Neeraa Lee. While in kerala he likes to be known as a - more...


    I'm writing this letter to you to tell you that I'm leaving you.

    I've been a good man to you for seven years, yet I have nothing to show for it.

    Life with you is unbearable. I called you at work just to see if you wanted to have lunch ( you know, maybe try to reconnect) and your boss told me that you had quit your job today and that was the last straw.

    Last week you came home and didn't even notice that I had a new aircut, cooked your favorite meal and even wore a brand-new pair of silk boxers to bed.

    You came home and ate in two minutes and went straight to sleep after watching TV. You don't tell me you love me anymore; you don't want to be intimate or anything. Either you're cheating on me or you don't love me anymore.

    Whatever the case, I'm gone.
    Your Ex-husband

    P. S.: Don't try to find me. Your sister and I are moving to West Virginia, if that's a problem, TOUGH!

    DEAR more...

    Q: Why did the owl, owl?
    A: Because the woodpecker would peck `er!

    Q: What is a polygon?
    A: A dead parrot!

    Q: What flies through the jungle singing opera?
    A: The parrots of Penzance!

    Q: What do you get if you cross a duck with a firework?
    A: A fire Quaker!

    Q: What is a parrot`s favorite game?
    A: Hide and Speak!

    Q: Why did the parrot wear a raincoat?
    A: Because she wanted to be a Polly unsaturated!

    Q: What did the gamekeeper say to the lord of the manor?
    A: `The pheasants are revolting`!

    Q: What is the definition of Robin?
    A: A bird who steals!

    Q: When is the best time to buy budgies?
    A: When they`re going cheap! Q: What do parrots eat?
    A: Polyfilla!

    Q: What do you give a sick bird?
    A: Tweetment!

    Q: What bird tastes just like butter?
    A: A stork!

    Q: What`s another name for a clever duck?
    A: A wise more...

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