Parlor Jokes / Recent Jokes

A witch went into a beauty parlor and asked the assistant how much it would cost to make her look like a film star. "Nothing," replied the assistant. "Nothing?" she asked, "but how can I look like a film star?" "Haven't you seen a film called The Creature from the Black Lagoon?" replied the assistant.

A man walks into a tattoo parlor and says he would like a $100 dollar bill on his dick. Well the tattoo artist laughs and says "I'll do it for free if you can give me one good reason for it." The guy thinks for a second and says. "Well one, I like to keep my money in my pants, two I like to watch my money grow, and three I want to see how fast my wife can blow a $100.

I've just come back from the beauty parlor! What a pity it was closed!

For months, Mrs. Chen had been nagging her husband to go
with her to the seance parlor of
Madame Roza. "Li, she's a real gypsy, and she brings the voices
of the dead from the other
world. We all talk to them! Last week I talked with my mother,
may she rest in peace. Li,
for twenty dollars you can talk to your grandpa Shin who you
miss so much!"
Li Chen could not resist her appeal. At the very next seance at
Madam Roza's Seance Parlor,
Li sat under the colored light at the green table, holding hands
with the person on each
side. All were humming, "Oooom, oooom, tonka tooom."
Madame Roza, her eyes lost in trance, was making passes over a
crystal ball. "My
medium... Vashtri," she called. "Come in. Who is that with you?
Who? Mr. Chen? Li Chen's
gandpa Shin?"
Li swallowed the lump in his throad and called, "Grampa? Shin?"
"Ah, Li?" a more...

A man walks into a tattoo parlor and says he would like a $100 dollar bill on his dick. Well the tattoo artist laughs and says "Ill do it for free if you can give me one good reason for it." The guy thinks for a second and says. "Well one, I like to keep my money in my pants, two I like to watch my money grow, and three I want to see how fast my wife can blow a $100.

Little Johnny's father decided it was time for 14-year-old Little Johnny, to learn the facts of life. He takes him to the local house of ill repute, which is fronted by a beauty parlor.

He introduces Little Johnny to the madam, and explains that it's time for his indoctrination to sex. The madam says, "You've been such a good customer over the years, I'm going to see to this personally."

So she takes Little Johnny by the hand and leads him upstairs, where she completes his deflowering. Later, as they are walking downstairs the madam says, "Since this is your first time, I'm going to see that you get the full treatment before you leave. I'm going to give you a manicure."

Two weeks later Little Johnny and his father run into the madam on the main street. Little Johnny is acting a little shy, so the madam smiles and says, "Well, Little Johnny, don't you remember me?"

"Yes, Ma'am, " Little Johnny stammers, more...

MANILA (Reuters) - A Filipino man was killed and his friend seriously wounded after they sarcastically applauded a student for singing Frank Sinatra's classic "My Way" off-key, according to a newspaper report.
The 21-year-old student felt insulted when the victims clapped after he sang the song at a karaoke parlor in downtown Manila, the reports said Monday.
After getting into a fight with the student's friends, the victims left the parlor to avoid trouble but were ambushed outside and shot by the student who was later arrested. Newspapers have said Philippine karaoke parlors have been removing "My Way" from play lists because fights frequently broke out - for unfathomable reasons - when the song was sung.
The song seems to drive many drunken men to commit anything from slight physical injuries to homicide, reports said.
In a remarkably similar incident last November, one man was killed and another wounded when a brawl broke out in a karaoke bar in more...