Tattoo Jokes

  • Funny Jokes

    Bill and Binny were couple. Biny wanted to give surprise on their 1st Anniversary. So Binny decided to having tattoo of Letter B on both hips each, and she had. On return to home, she saw her hubby Bill was sitting on Sofa, so she turned back and dropped the pant and showed the hip to him. Bill shouted: "Who is the hell is BOB?!!"

    A white guy is being shipped off to Jamaica for a year with the army.
    His fiance, Wendy, is really worried about her man being unfaithful, so she asks him to tattoo her name to his penis...He agrees, and does so.
    When his penis isn't erect you can see the letters W and Y.
    The woman feeling secure knowing that her name is tattooed on her man's penis says good-bye to her fiance and he leaves for Jamaica.
    One day, while in Jamaica, the guy is at the urinal and a black Jamaican comes and stands at the urinal next to him... The white guy happens to notice that the Jamaican also has a tattoo on his penis and he could see the letters W and Y, so he says to the Jamaican, "Wow, that's really interesting, I guess you have a girlfriend named Wendy too?"
    And the Jamaican looks at him with a puzzled look and then stretches out his penis and it says...
    "Welcome to Jamaica have a nice day!"

    My girlfriend thought it would be romantic to have tattoos of each other's names.

    So she got a tattoo with my name and I changed her name by deed poll to Newcastle United.

    A woman is picked up by Dennis Rodman in a bar. They like each other and she goes back with him to his hotel room. He removes his shirt revealing all his tattoos and she sees that on his arm is one which reads, "Reebok". She thinks that's a bit odd and asks him about it. Dennis says, "When I play basketball, the cameras pick up the tattoo and Reebok pays me for advertisement."
    A bit later, his pants are off and she sees "Puma" tattooed on his leg. He gives the same explanation for the unusual tattoo. Finally, the underwear comes off and she sees the word "AIDS" tattooed on his penis. She jumps back with shock..
    "I'm not going to do it with a guy who has AIDS!"
    He says, "It's cool baby, in a minute it's going to say "ADIDAS".

    A brand new prostitute at a Nevada brothel was assigned her first customer. She went into the room with the customer and just less than a minute later, came out laughing hysterically. The madam confronted her, saying, "You were with him less than a minute and came out laughing. That's no way to treat a customer."
    The rookie prostitute replied, "I just couldn't help it. He undressed and when I looked down at his dick it was the size of a peanut and had a tattoo on it which says 'SHORTY'!"
    The madam was furious, and assigned a veteran prostitute to go in and give this poor guy his money's worth.
    A half hour later, the veteran prostitute came out of the room. She could barely walk and her eyes were beaming! She kept saying "WOW!" over and over again. She walked over to the rookie prostitute and said, "You needed to spend more time with this guy. When he gets excited that tattoo reads: 'SHORTY'S BAR AND GRILL - FINE DINING - ALBUQUERQUE, NEW more...

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