Machinery Jokes

  • Funny Jokes

    These are actual signs found around the world...
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    A sign seen on a restroom dryer at O'Hare Field in Chicago: Do not activate with wet hands.
    At a car dealership: The best way to get back on your feet? Miss a car payment.
    At A Laundry Shop: How about we refund your money, send you a new one at no charge, close the store and have the manager shot. Would that be satisfactory?
    At a Music Store: Out to lunch. Bach at 12:30. Offenbach sooner.
    At a number of US military bases: Restricted to unauthorized personnel.
    At a pizza shop: 7 days without pizza makes one weak.
    At a Santa Fe gas station: We will sell gasoline to anyone in a glass container.
    At a tire shop in Milwaukee: Invite us to your next blowout.
    At a Towing Company: We don't charge an arm and a leg. We want tows.
    At a Used Car Lot: Second Hand cars in first crash condition.
    At an Auto Body Shop: May we have the next dents?
    At an optometrist's more...

    * At the entrance of the large machinery plant: Warning to young ladies: If you wear loose clothes, beware of the machinery. If you wear tight clothes, beware of the machinist. * At a Santa Fe gas station: We will sell gasoline to anyone in a glass container. * On the wall of a Baltimore estate: Trespassers will be prosecuted to the full extent of the law. - Sisters of Mercy * In a Los Angeles dance hall: Good clean dancing every night but Sunday. * On a Maine shop: Our motto is to give our customers the lowest possible prices and workmanship. * On a display of “I love you only” Valentine cards: Now available in multi-packs. * In the window of a Kentucky appliance store: Don’t kill your wife. Let our washing machine do the dirty work.

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