Lee Jokes / Recent Jokes

A police officer stopped a young man for speeding. He stepped out of his patrol car, adjusted his sunglasses, and swaggered up to the young man's window. "What chew driving so fast for boy? You going to a fahhr? Let me see your license, boy." The young man handed over his license. Then the officer noticed that the back seat of the car was full of large knives. The officer said, "Tell me boy, why you got them knives on that there back seat?" The young man replied, "Well sir, I'm a juggler." The officer spat some tobacco juice and then he said, "A juggler; well you don't say. Boy, put cha hands on the trunk of yer car; you going to jail!" The young man pleaded with the officer not to take him to jail. He offered to prove to the officer that he was a juggler by way of demonstration. He said, "You can even hold me at gunpoint while I juggle for you." The officer reluctantly allowed him to prove his point while he held him at gunpoint. Two more...

Bill Clinton, Lee Kwan Yew and Mahathir arranged to go on a world tour, traveling on a plane which can only take 4 people, including the pilot. Just before they left, Bill Clinton suddenly announced that he would like to bring his little nephew along.' But the plane is designed to take 4 people only, and I'm afraid it may crash!' worried the pilot. However, Clinton insisted, and finally the boy was allowed to board the plane. True enough, the plane encountered problems and was going to crash, but to their dismay, there were only 4 parachutes. Clinton grabbed the 1st parachute and exclaimed,' I'm the president of the mighty USA, and my life is the most valuable!' and jumped down the plane without a second look. Lee Kwan Yew grabbed the 2nd parachute and exclaimed,' I'm the Senior Minister of Singapore, and my life is just as important!' and jumped down. Mahathir, not to be outdone, grabbed the 3rd parachute and exclaimed,' I'm the Prime Minister of Malaysia, the most important of more...

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"Hello, I'm Mike Walrus, and this is 60 Seconds"

"We're here in Hong Kong to bring you a story that may shock and horrify some viewers. This city is a beehive of industry and activity, a monument to free enterprise and commerce, but behind these shops and warehouses, hidden from public view, is the sordid story of a condiment gone terribly wrong.

"I'm talking about duck sauce. You've probably seen or tried it before, those little orange packets tossed in with your Chinese take-out meals. But look closely at them...those little floating bits aren't apricot...they're real duck.

"Yes, it's a tragic tale of waterfowl laid waste, an underground industry that reaps millions of export dollars and is depleting the duck population all around the South China Sea.

"We tracked several shipments of duck sauce to a clandestine factory here, operating under the name more...

What is Bruce Lee's favorite weapon?
Kodaa Lee

According to Bruce Lee, which is the Venomous snake?
Ana Lee

Place where Bruce Lee stays when he is in Kerala
Adima Lee

Bruce Lee's Favorite Malayalam Channel
Kaira Lee

Bruce Lee favorite vegetable?
Thakkaa Lee

What sound does Bruce Lee make when some one hits him?
Nilavi Lee

What is Bruce Lee's pet
Chunde Lee

What kind of water does Bruce Lee prefer with his lunch?
Karingaa Lee

What is Bruce Lee's Girl Friend's name?
Anaarka Lee

What is Bruce Lee's nick name?
Neeraa Lee

While in kerala he likes to be known
Malaya Lee

Hal E. Luya (Hallelujah)
Hal Jalikakick (How'd ya like a kick)
Hammond Eggs (Ham and Eggs)
Hank E. Panky (Hanky Panky)
Harmon Ikka (Harmonica)
Harris Mint (Harassment)
Harrison Fire (Hair is on Fire)
Harry Balzac (Hairy Ball Sack)
Harry Weiner (Hairy Wiener)
Hayden Seek (Hide & Seek)
Haywood Jablowme (Hey, Would You Blow Me?)
Haywood Jashootmee (Hey Would You Shoot Me?)
Hein Noon (High Noon)
Helen Back (Hell and Back)
Helena Hanbaskett (Hell In A Hand Basket)
Henador Titzhoff (He Gnawed Her Tits Off)
Herbie Hind (Her Behind)
Herb E. Side (Herbiside)
Herbie Voor (Herbivore)
Holden Mcgroin (Holding My Groin)
Holly Dayin (Holiday Inn)
Holly Wood (Hollywood)
Homan Provement (Home Improvent)
Homer Sexual (Homosexual)
Howard I. No (How Would I Know?)
Howe D. Pardner (Howdy Partner)
Hu Flung Pu (Who Flung Poo?)
Huang Annsaw (Wrong Answer)
Hugh Beeotch more...

Diet for Stress How's your stress level? This should help. It is more than a diet, so read on... This diet is designed to help you cope with the stress that builds up during the day. Breakfast: 1/2 grapefruit 1 slice whole wheat toast 8 oz. skim milkLunch: 4 oz. lean broiled chicken breast 1 cup steamed spinach 1 cup herb tea 1 Oreo cookieMid-Afternoon snack: The rest of Oreos in the package 2 pints Rocky Road ice cream with nuts, cherries and whipped cream 1 jar hot fudge sauceDinner: 2 loaves garlic bread 4 cans or 1 large pitcher Coke 1 large sausage, mushroom and cheese pizza 3 Snickers barsLate Evening News: Entire frozen Sara Lee cheesecake (eaten directly from freezer)Rules for this Diet1. If you eat something and no one sees you eat it, it has no calories. 2. If you drink a diet soda with a candy bar, the calories in the candy jar are canceled out by the diet soda. 3. When you eat with someone else, calories don't count if you do not eat more than they do. 4. Food used for more...

What is Bruce Lee's favorite weapon?
----- Kodaa Lee
According to Bruce Lee, which is the Venomous snake?
----- Ana Lee
Place where Bruce Lee stays when he is in Kerala?
----- Adima Lee
Bruce Lee's Favorite Malayalam Channel?
----- Kaira Lee
Bruce Lee favorite vegitable?
----- Thakkaa Lee
What sound does Bruce Lee make when some one hits him?
----- Nilavi Lee
What is Bruce Lee's pet?
------ Chunde Lee
What kind of water does Bruce Lee prefer with his lunch?
------ Karingaa Lee
What is Bruce Lee's Girl Friend's name?
------ Anaarka Lee
What is Bruce Lee's nick name?
------ Neeraa Lee
While in kerala he likes to be known?
------ Malaya Lee