Lass Jokes / Recent Jokes

One day wee jordy was out walking with his lass in the fields of scotland, while walking through the heather the lass says;"ah wee jordy i can tell you want to hold my hand! wee jordy says "aye lass that i do, but how can you tell? Well she says "i can tell by the gleam in your eye." Walking along a bit further she says to him "wee jordy i can tell you wantto give me a kiss"." well I lass that i do, but how can you tell?" "ah wee jordy, i can tell by the gleam in your eye!"Walking along a bit further she says "wee jordy i can tell you want tomake love to me". he says, "aye lass that i do! you can tell by the gleam in my eye!""No!" she says... "by the tilt in your kilt!"

A beautiful lass was noticing a Scotsman in full regalia at a parade. Shy but curious, she approached him and asked, "Is it true, what they say about what Scotsman do not wear beneath their kilts?" The Scotsman replied, "Well, lass, you'll just have to take a wee peek and discover for yourself." She timidly lifted the hem and peered beneath. Immediately, she dropped it and said, "Aye, 'tis gruesome!" To which he replied, "Best look again, lass, I think it's grew some more!"

One day wee jordy was out walking with his lass in the fields of scotland,
while walking through the heather the lass says;
"ah wee jordy i can tell you want to hold my hand!
wee jordy says "aye lass that i do, but how can you tell?
Well she says "i can tell by the gleam in your eye."
Walking along a bit further she says to him "wee jordy i can tell you want
to give me a kiss".
"well I lass that i do, but how can you tell?"
"ah wee jordy, i can tell by the gleam in your eye!"
Walking along a bit further she says "wee jordy i can tell you want to
make love to me".
he says, "aye lass that i do! you can tell by the gleam in my eye!"
"No!" she says... "by the tilt in your kilt!"

One day wee jordy was out walking with his lass in the fields of scotland, while walking through the heather the lass says;"ah wee jordy i can tell you want to hold my hand! wee jordy says "aye lass that i do, but how can you tell? Well she says "i can tell by the gleam in your eye."Walking along a bit further she says to him "wee jordy i can tell you wantto give me a kiss"."well I lass that i do, but how can you tell?""ah wee jordy, i can tell by the gleam in your eye!"Walking along a bit further she says "wee jordy i can tell you want tomake love to me".he says, "aye lass that i do! you can tell by the gleam in my eye!""No!" she says... "by the tilt in your kilt!"

The modest young lass had just purchased some lingerie and asked if she might have the sentence, "If you can read this you're too damn close" embroidered on her panties and bra. "Yes Madame," said the clerk. "I'm quite certain that could be done. Would you prefer block or script letters?" "Braille," she replied.

An Irishman by the name of O'Mally proposed to his girl on St. Patrick's Day.
He gave her a ring with a synthetic diamond.
The excited young lass showed it to her father, a jeweler. He took one look at it and saw it wasn't real.
The young lass, on learning it wasn't real, returned to her future husband and protested vehemently about his cheapness.
"It was in honor of St. Patrick's Day," he smiled. "I gave you a sham rock."

How about joining me for a cozy weekend in a quiet suburban hotel?" he whispered in the curvaceous lass' ear.
"I'm afraid," she said, "that my awareness of your proclivities in the esoteric aspects of sexual behavior precludes you from such erotic confrontation."
"I don't get it," he said.
"Exactly," she smiled.