Karl Jokes

  • Funny Jokes

    A political activist named Dave was just arriving in Hell, and was
    told he had a choice to make. He could go to Capitalist Hell or to
    Communist Hell.
    Naturally, Dave wanted to compare the two, so he wandered over to
    Capitalist Hell. There outside the door was Rockerfeller, looking bored.
    "What's it like in there?" asked Dave. "Well," he replied, "In
    Capitalist Hell, they flay you alive, boil you in oil, chain you to a
    rock and let a vulture tear your liver out, and cut you up into small
    pieces with sharp knives."
    "That's terrible!!" gasped Dave. "I'm going to check out Communist
    Hell!" He went over to Communist Hell, where he discovered a huge line
    of people waiting to get in; the line circled around the lobby seven
    times before receding off into the horizon. Dave pushed his way through
    to the head of the line, where he found Karl Marx busily signing people
    in. Dave asked Karl more...

    The grave of Karl Marx is just another communist plot.

    Karl Rove says that President Bush would veto bills allowing expanded embryonic stem-cell research, saying "We were all an embryo at one point."
    But look what happened to some of those embroys--they grew up to become Karl Rove and President Bush.

    PS Is anyone looking into directing research into discovering which embryos will turn into evil douchebags?

    "Scooter Libby, who got indicted, has set up a legal defense fund to help pay his legal bills. It's pretty good, for a $1,000 donation you get a hand-written thank you note and the name of a CIA agent." --Jay Leno

    "Libby was indicted on two counts of obstruction of justice, three counts of perjury, and one count of not being as smart as Karl Rove." --Jon Stewart

    "What did Scooter Libby say when he bumped into President Bush at the White House?. .. Pardon me." --Jay Leno

    "Outside the courthouse, Libby's lawyer said all he wants to do is clear his client's good name. I don't know, Scooter? Is that a good name?" --Jay Leno

    "Vice President Dick Cheney's former assistant, Scooter Libby, pleaded not guilty to the Yeah, the weird thing is since his name is Scooter, he's being tried in juvenile court." --Conan O'Brien

    "Dick Cheney's right-hand man Scooter Libby has been indicted. By more...

    Q. How many Glenn Hubbards does it take to change a lightbulb?
    A. None. It is not necessary to change the lightbulb. There is no evidence that visibility moves in lockstep with new lightbulb installation.

    Q. How many Larry Lindseys does it take to change a lightbulb?
    A. None. All you need to do is open the refrigerator door.

    Q. How many John Snows does it take to change a lightbulb?
    A. The problem is which John Snow. The one who thought we needed to conserve electricity, or the one who thinks that electrical power is limitless.

    Q. How many Karl Roves does it take to change a lightbulb?
    A. Karl Rove ain't changin no lightbulb. You're changing the bulb, bub, and if you don't he'll fuck you frontways, sideways, upside down, and your career at Princeton will be over.

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