Joints Jokes / Recent Jokes
Yo mama so ugly when she joined an ugly contest, they said "Sorry, no professionals."
Yo mama so ugly she looks out the window and got arrested for mooning.
Yo mama so ugly just after she was born, her mother said "What a treasure!" and her father said "Yes, let's go bury it."
Yo mama so ugly they push her face into dough to make gorilla cookies.
Yo mama so ugly they filmed "Gorillas in the Mist" in her shower
Yo mama so ugly they didn't give her a costume when she tried out for Star Wars.
Yo mama so ugly instead of putting the bungee cord around her ankle, they put it around her neck
Yo mama so ugly she gets 364 extra days to dress up for Halloween.
Yo mama so ugly when she walks into a bank, they turn off the surveillence cameras
Yo mama so ugly her mom had to be drunk to breast feed her
Yo mama so ugly her mom had to tie a steak more...
1970: Long Hair
2000: Longing for hair
1970: The perfect high.
2000: The perfect high yield mutual fund.
1970: Keg.
2000: EKG.
1970: Acid Rock.
2000: Acid Reflux.
1970: Moving to California because it's cool.
2000: Moving to California because it's warm.
1970: Growing pot.
2000: Growing pot belly.
1970: Douglas Street bridge.
2000: Dental bridge.
1970: Watching John Glenn's historic flight with your parents.
2000: Watching John Glenn's historic flight with your children.
1970: Trying to look like Marlon Brando or Elizabeth Taylor.
2000: Trying NOT to look like Marlon Brando or Elizabeth Taylor.
1970: Seeds and stems.
2000: Roughage.
1970: Popping pills, smoking joints.
2000: Popping joints.
1970: Our president's struggle with Fidel.
2000: Our president's struggle with fidelity.
1970: more...
Isn't this the truth!...
1970: Long Hair
2000: Longing for hair
1970: The perfect high.
2000: The perfect high yield mutual fund.
1970: Keg.
2000: EKG.
1970: Acid Rock.
2000: Acid Reflux.
1970: Moving to California because it's cool.
2000: Moving to California because it's warm.
1970: Growing pot.
2000: Growing pot belly.
1970: Douglas Street bridge.
2000: Dental bridge.
1970: Watching John Glenn's historic flight with your parents.
2000: Watching John Glenn's historic flight with your children.
1970: Trying to look like Marlon Brando or Elizabeth Taylor.
2000: Trying NOT to look like Marlon Brando or Elizabeth Taylor.
1970: Seeds and stems.
2000: Roughage.
1970: Popping pills, smoking joints.
2000: Popping joints.
1970: Our president's struggle with Fidel.
2000: Our president's struggle with more...
Why do witches have stiff joints? They get broomatism!
Old & New concerns for the baby boomers: Then: Long hair. Now: Longing for hair. Then: KegNow: EKG. Then: Acid rockNow: Acid reflux. Then: Moving to California because it's cool. Now: Moving to California because it's hot. Then: Watching John Glenn's historic flight with your parents. Now: Watching John Glenn's historic flight with your kids. Then: Trying to look like Marlon Brando or Elizabeth Taylor. Now: Trying not to look like Marlon Brando or Elizabeth Taylor. Then: Seeds and stems. Now: Roughage. Then: Popping pills, smoking joints. Now: Popping joints. Then: Our president's struggle with Fidel. Now: Our president's struggle with fidelity. Then: Paar. Now: AARP. Then: Being caught with Hustler magazine. Now: Being caught by Hustler magazine. Then: Killer weed. Now: Weed killer. Then: Hoping for a BMW. Now: Hoping for a BM. Then: The Grateful Dead. Now: Dr. Kevorkian. Then: Getting out to a new, hip joint. Now: Getting a new hip joint.
On the first day of Christmas, my true love gave to me
A dime bag of Panama Red
On the second day of Christmas, my true love gave to me
Two hits of acid
And a dime bag of Panama Red
On the third day of Christmas, my true love gave to me
Three snorts of coke
Two hits of acid
And a dime bag of Panama Red
On the forth day of Christmas, my true love gave to me
Four pink pills
Three snorts of coke
Two hits of acid
And a dime bag of Panama Red
On the fifth day of Christmas, my true love gave to me
Five pounds of hashish
Four pink pills
Three snorts of coke
Two hits of acid
And a dime bag of Panama Red
On the sixth day of Christmas, my true love gave to me
Six joints a smoking
Five pounds of hashish
Four pink pills
Three snorts of coke
Two hits of acid
And a dime bag of Panama Red
On the seventh day of Christmas, my true love gave to me
Seven cubes of more...
Isn't this the truth!...1970: Long Hair2000: Longing for hair1970: The perfect high.2000: The perfect high yield mutual fund.1970: Keg.2000: EKG.1970: Acid Rock.2000: Acid Reflux.1970: Moving to California because it's cool.2000: Moving to California because it's warm.1970: Growing pot.2000: Growing pot belly.1970: Douglas Street bridge.2000: Dental bridge.1970: Watching John Glenn's historic flight with your parents.2000: Watching John Glenn's historic flight with your children.1970: Trying to look like Marlon Brando or Elizabeth Taylor.2000: Trying NOT to look like Marlon Brando or Elizabeth Taylor.1970: Seeds and stems.2000: Roughage.1970: Popping pills, smoking joints.2000: Popping joints.1970: Our president's struggle with Fidel.2000: Our president's struggle with fidelity.1970: Paar.2000: AARP.1970: Being caught with Hustler magazine.2000: Being caught with Hustler magazine.1970: Killer weed.2000: Weed killer.1970: Hoping for a BMW.2000: Hoping for a BM.1970: The Grateful more...