Errand Jokes

  • Funny Jokes

    St. Peter stood at the Pearly Gates, waiting for the incoming. He saw Jesus walking by and caught his attention.
    " Jesus, could you mind the gate while I go do an errand?"
    " Sure," replied Jesus. " What do I have to do?"
    " Just find out about the people who arrive. Ask about their background, their family, and their lives. Then decide if they deserve entry into Heaven."
    " Sounds easy enough. OK."
    So Jesus waited at the gates while St. Peter went off on his errand.
    The first person to approach the gates was a wrinkled old man. Jesus summoned him to the examination table and sat across from him. Jesus peered at the old man and asked, " What was it you did for a living?"
    The old man replied, "I was a carpCLICK HERE!."
    Jesus remembered his own earthly existence and leaned forward. " Did you have any family?" he asked.
    " Yes, I had a son, but I lost more...

    A woman who ran to the mall for a quick errand lost her purse, but an honest teenage boy returned it to her. The woman looked inside her purse and remarked, "That's strange. Earlier I had a $20 bill inside, but now it's gone, and instead I see two fives and a ten." "That's right," the boy explained, "the last time I found a lady's purse, she did not have change for a reward."

    St. Peter stood at the Pearly Gates, waiting for the incoming. He saw Jesus walking by and caught his attention. "Jesus, could you mind the gate while I go do an errand?"
    "Sure," replied Jesus. "What do I have to do?"
    "Just find out about the people who arrive. Ask about their background, their family, and their lives. Then decide if they deserve entry into Heaven."
    "Sounds easy enough. OK."
    So Jesus waited at the gates while St. Peter went off on his errand.
    The first person to approach the gates was a wrinkled old man. Jesus summoned him to the examination table and sat across from him. Jesus peered at the old man and asked, "What was it you did for a living?"
    The old man replied, "I was a carpenter."
    Jesus remembered his own earthly existence and leaned forward. "Did you have any family?" he asked.
    "Yes, I had a son, but I lost him."
    Jesus leaned forward more...

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