Dean Jokes / Recent Jokes

One night four MBA students were boozing till late night and didn''t study for the test which was scheduled for the next day. In the morning they thought of a plan. They made themselves look as dirty and weird as they could with grease and dirt. Then they went up to the dean and said that they had gone to a wedding last night and on their return the tyre of their car burst and they had to push the car all the way back and that they were in no condition to appear for the test. The Dean was a Just person so he said that you can have a retest after three days.
After 3 days they said they were ready. On the third day they appeared before the dean. The Dean said that as this was a special condition all four were required to be in separate rooms for the test. They all agreed as they had prepared well in last three days.
The test consisted of two question with a total marks of 100.

Q1. Write down your Names. (2 marks)
Q2. Which tyre burst? (98 marks)

The Dean of Women at an exclusive girls' college was lecturing her students on sexual morality.
"In moments of temptation," said the speaker to the class, "ask yourself just one question: Is an hour of pleasure worth a lifetime of shame?"
A sweet young thing in the back of the room rose to ask a question of her own: "How do you make it last an hour?"

Before a series, St. Louis manager Frankie Frisch instructed his pitching staff to avoid throwing Brooklyn's Tony Cuccinello a fastball.Dizzy Dean objected. "He can't hit my fastball."He begged Frisch to let him throw Cuccinello a fastball. Frisch refused. Finally with the game in hand, he relented. Dean threw Cuccinello a fastball. Cuccinello hit it out of the park.Dean turned to Frisch. "By gosh, Frankie. You were right for once."

At U. of Michigan, we used to tell this one about Michigan State, however, any despised college will do.
Bubba, the most popular football player at Michigan State had completed his eligibility, and was set to graduate. The problem was, he had never attended a course, or learned anything. The Dean and football coach wanted to graduate him, however, to stave off student revolt.
Still, they had to have him demonstrate some sort of competence. So, at the graduation ceremony, when Bubba's name was called, he went up to the front.
"Bubba, if you can pass this test, you graduate," said the Dean. "What is two plus two?"
Bubba, thought for awhile, counted on his fingers, and with a puzzled, yet hopeful voice, said, "Duh, four?"
A cry went up in unison from the student body, seated in their caps and gowns: "Aw, give him another chance!"

College student: "Hey, Dad! I've got some great news for you!"
Father: "What, son?"
College student: "Remember that $500 you promised me if I made the Dean's list?"
Father: "I certainly do."
College student: "Well, you get to keep it."

The college dean phoned a student's father at home and told him that he had some good and some bad news about his son.

"Tell me the bad news first," said the father.

"Your son's a hopeless homosexual," replied the dean.

"How awful," said the dismayed father. "But what's the good news?"

The dean confided, "He has just been elected Queen of the May."

The dean of women at an exclusive girl's college was lecturing her students on sexual morality. "In moments of temptation," said the speaker to the class, "ask yourself just one question: Is an hour of pleasure worth a lifetime of shame?" A sweet young thing in the back of the room rose to ask: "How do you make it last an hour?"