Mean Jokes

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    The miossing rooster

    Hot 2 years ago

    A priest had a small flock of chickens, but the prize rooster went missing, and he didn't know where to find it. So at the sermon next Sunday he queried:
    "Has anybody got a cock?"
    All the men stood up.
    "No, no, I mean has anybody seen a cock?"
    All the women stood up.
    "No, no, I mean has anybody seen my cock?"
    All the nuns stood up!

    Together again

    Hot 2 years ago

    Maria is a devout Catholic. She gets married and has 17 children. Then her husband dies. She remarries two weeks later, and has 22 children by her next husband. Then he dies. A while later, she dies.At the funeral, the priest looks skyward and says, "At least they're finally together."A guy sitting in the front row says, "Excuse me Father, but do you mean her and her first husband, or her and her second husband?"The priest says, "I mean her legs."

    Religious joke #11032

    Hot 6 years ago

    As a devout Catholic, Maria doesn't use condoms with her husband. So over the
    years, they have had 17 children. After the husband died, Maria remarried and
    had another 22 kids with her second husband before he too dies. Eventually,
    Maria's time also came.
    At her wake, the priest looked tenderly at Maria lying in her coffin. Then, he
    looked up into the heavens and said, "At last... they are finally together."
    A man standing next to the priest looked confused and asked, "Father, what do
    you mean? Do you mean Maria and her first husband? Or her second husband?"
    Says the priest: "I mean her legs."


    Hot 7 years ago

    it was the night before thanksgiving
    and tara was in bed when she heard her parents call each other bitches and basterds.
    so she went to their room and asked her dad
    "dad whats a bitch?" and her dad said"its what all women are." then she went to her mom and asked "mom whats a basterd?"and her mom replied "its what all men are." then tara went back to bed. the next day was thanksgiving and tara and her parents were at the market when her dad put down some condoms "daddy what are condoms?" and her dad said "its what all men have." then tara went to her mom and saw her with a box of tampons and asked her mom "what are tampons?"and her mom said"its what all women have." now there back at home and there waiting for their family to come over .so tara went to see what her dad is she went to the bathroom and saw her dad shaving when he cut himself and yelled "SHIT!" so tara asked her more...

    A farmer walked into an attorney's office wanting to file for a
    divorce. The attorney asked, "May I help you?" The farmer said,
    "Yea, I want to get one of those dayvorce's."
    The attorney said, "well do you have any grounds?" The farmer
    said, "Yea, I got about 140 acres." The attorney said, " No, you
    don't understand, do you have a case?" The farmer said, "No, I
    don't have a Case, but I have a John Deere."
    The attorney said, "No you don't understand, I mean do you have
    a grudge?" The farmer said, "Yea I got a grudge, that's where I
    park my John Deere." The attorney said, "No sir, I mean do you
    have a suit?"
    The farmer said, "Yes sir, I got a suit. I wear th to church on
    The exasperated attorney said, "Well sir, does your
    wife beat you up or anything?"
    The farmer said, "No sir, we both get up about more...

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