Between Jokes / Recent Jokes

What's the difference between a baritone saxophone and a chain saw? The exhaust.

The difference between Niagara and Viagra is that Niagara Falls.

Here it is nicely illustrated:
Let's say a guy named Roger is attracted to a woman named Elaine. He asks her out to a movie; she accepts; they have a pretty good time. A few nights later he asks her out to dinner, and again they enjoy themselves. They continue to see each other regularly, and after a while neither one of them is seeing anybody else. And then, one evening when they're driving home, a thought occurs to Elaine, and, without really thinking, she says it aloud:' 'Do you realize that, as of tonight, we've been seeing each other for exactly six months?'' And then there is silence in the car. To Elaine, it seems like a very loud silence. She thinks to herself: Geez, I wonder if it bothers him that I said that. Maybe he's been feeling confined by our relationship; maybe he thinks I'm trying to push him into some kind of obligation that he doesn't want, or isn't sure of.
And Roger is thinking: Gosh. Six months.
And Elaine is thinking: But, hey, I'm not so sure I more...

Q. What is the difference between a bachelor and a married man?
A. Bachelor comes home, sees what's in the refrigerator, goes to bed. Married man comes home, sees what's in the bed, and goes to the refrigerator.

Q: What is the difference between the Dresden bombing and Germany's best comedian? A: Only the first one can make you smile.

The difference between theory and practice. .. is larger in practice than in theory.

Q: What's the difference between a bull and an orchestra? A: The bull has the horns in the front and the asshole in the back. A conductor and a violist are standing in the middle of the road. which one do you run over first, and why? The conductor. Business before pleasure. Q: Why are conductor's hearts so coveted for transplants? A: They've had so little use. Q: What's the difference between a conductor and a sack of fertilizer? A: The sack. Q: What do you have when a group of conductors are up to their necks in wet concrete? A: Not enough concrete. Did you hear about the planeload of conductors en route to the European Festival? The good news: it crashed. The bad news: there were three empty seats on board. Q: What's the difference between a symphony conductor and Dr Scholl's footpads? A: Dr Scholl's footpads buck up the feet. Q: What's the difference between a pig and a symphony orchestra conductor? A: There are some things a pig just isn't willing to do. Q: What is the ideal more...