"Top Ten Management Lies" joke

Hot 2 years agoby Alexander

1 "Employees are our most valuable asset."
2. "I have an open door policy."
3. "You could earn more money under the new plan."
4. "We're reorganizing to better serve our customers."
5. "The future is bright."
6. "We reward risk takers."
7. "Performance will be rewarded."
8. "We don't shoot the messenger."
9. "Training is a high priority."
10. "I haven't heard any rumours."
11. "We'll review your performance in six months."
12. "Our people are the best."
13. "Your input is important to us."
14 “You will receive two weeks training every year.”

During the wedding rehearsal, the groom approached the pastor with an unusual offer.
"I'll give you $100 if you'll change the wedding vows," the groom said. "When you get to me and the part where it asks if I promise to 'love, honor and obey' and 'forsaking more...

What do you say to a baby Jewish American Princess?
Gucci Gucci Goo

A doctor, an architect, and an attorney were dining at the country club one day, and the conversation turned to the subject of their respective dogs, which were apparently quite extraordinary. A wager was placed on who had the most intelligent dog. The physician offered to show more...

A driver is pulled over by a police man.
Man: Is there a problem Officer?
Officer: Sir, you were speeding.
Man: Oh I see.
Officer: Can I see your licence please?
Man: I'd give it to you but I don't have one.
Officer: Don't have one?
Man: Lost it 4 more...

A local business was looking for office help and put up a sign saying: "HELP WANTED. Must be able to type, must be good with a computer and must be bilingual. We are an Equal Opportunity Employer."
A short time afterwards, a golden retriever dog trotted up to the more...

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marla:The sick room door can not be locked at any given time
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crazy_driver_78:15 "This is a Top Ten List."
Funny Joke? 21 vote(s). 71% are positive. 2 comment(s).