"There were 3 lads" joke

There were 3 lads called shit, fuckoff and manners. Shit gets run over so fuckoff runs to the police station
"Quick, my friends been run over" He shouts
"Ok calm down" says the policeman. "Wots ur name?"
"Fuckoff"
"Wots ur name"
"Fuckoff" He says again
"Where are your manners?" Says the policeman
Fuckoff replies
"Outside picking shit up off the floor!"

A guy says to his friend, "I can't remember if the doctor told me my wife has AIDS or Alzheimer's."
His friend says, "It's simple. Drive her to the other side of town. If she finds her way home, don't fuck her."

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A man goes out and buys the best car available in the US or Europe, a 2001 Turbo BeepBeep. It is the best and most expensive car in the world, and it runs him $500, 000. He takes it out for a spin and, while doing so, stops for a red light. An old man on a moped, both looking more...

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EMPLOYEE PERFORMANCE EVALUATION
Date ____________________
Name _____________________
Department ________________________
Title _____________________________
Supervisor _________________________
KNOWLEDGE
1. This s.o.b. really knows his shit!
2. more...

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I farted in an elevator yesterday... it was wrong on so many levels.

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A story is told of a Jewish man who was riding on the subway reading an Arab newspaper. A friend of his, who happened to be riding in the same subway car, noticed this strange phenomenon. Very upset, he approached the newspaper reader.
"Moshe, have you lost your mind? more...

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